Imagine my surprise when, digging around E2 in search of my first nodeshell
, i should come upon one that speaks of my greatest secret.
Here then, for the sake of hopeful initiation into the The Nodeshell Rescue Team, i reveal in E2 the story of my Space Penis.
I can't say for certain why my penis decided to detach itself from my groin late one evening and zoom out my skylight window.
I suspect it had something to do with my long term unintentional celibacy. My penis, no doubt sick of dating my right hand, and probably sick of having to be associated with my entire girlfriendless body, decided to take matters into it's own hands (and out of mine).
Once outside my room, it looped around my house once like a graceful dove, darted in and out of some nearby trees and then, like a bat out of hell, shot straight
into space...and was gone
A sonic boom rippled through the stratosphere as my penis broke the sound barrier exiting our atmosphere and i doubt it looked back as it picked up speed winging past the Moon. If i still had control over him, i know where i would have taken him. I'd have wipped my willy into the immense Valles Marineris canyons of mars, skimmed my member over the icy oceans of Europa with Jupiter filling the horizen and dodged my dingaling through the distant comets of the Oort Cloud. But my Space Penis had other ideas, as it always did, even when attached to me back on Earth.
Like a bullet, my penis was on a mission, straight as can be in a curved spacetime universe, it increased it's speeds until the light of the stars themselves could not keep up, my purple spaceship with a purpose. It flew away from the Galactic rim where our planet resides and towards the very center of the Milky Way where millions of dancing and swirling constellations, asteriods, even the empty fabric of space converge and plummet, pulled inexorably into...
Something else, something immense, in the very heart of our Galaxy... and suddenly i understood why my neglected phallus had abandoned me. It had in fact abandoned all terrestrial pussy for something grander. My shlong of the stars was headed to the Giant Black Hole at the centre of our galaxy, a cosmic vagina from which all matter strives to enter. Every atom, every planet, every wave/particle of electromagnetic energy, and my space penis, plunged towards some extraterrestrial nookie.
I suddenly imagined thousands, if not millions of frustrated alien space penis's, appendages of all sorts and sizes that had detached themselves from other creatures that could'nt get any on a similar mission hurtling towards some benevolent intercourse.
What happened to him, i do not know, for he never came back. Possibly he went to his doom squeezed out of existence by infinite gravity or perhaps achieved some sort of transcendental orgasm thanks to a naked singularity.
I've recently had a new penis attached and from that day on, I always kept the skylight window closed.