In the gay community, the ability to recognize someone as gay is known as "gaydar" (From the words "gay" + "radar"). This is done by whatever means available, demeanor, voice patterns, or simply by magical intuition.

In the world 'o Mormons, the ability to recognize other Mormons is known similarly as "modar". The following are a number of ways to detect a Mormon, and hone your modar.

The first way to detect a Mormon is to ask where they are from. If the answer is "Utah", you have an 80% chance that they are a Mormon. Similarly, if your are in Utah, than there is an 80% chance that any average Joe walking down the street is a Mormon.

Another way to tell a Mormon is by the things he/she is wearing. If any of their clothes say "BYU" on them, they have a 95% chance of being a Mormon. If they are wearing a CTR ring, they have a 99.7% chance of being a Mormon. A CTR ring looks like a shield and says "CTR" which stands for "Choose the Right". Also, married Mormons and Mormon males over 19 will often have an undershirt with a neck that swoops down over their chest, causing a crease known as a "Mormon smiley."

Language is a dead giveaway. Mormons will often replace curse words with more tame versions. The following are a few translations from common speak to Mormon speak:

REAL WORLD WORD = MORMON VERSION

Shit = Shoot, Shiz, Shat (past tense), crud

Ass = "A", Arse, butt, rear, booty

Fuck = Fudge, Frick, Fetch

Damn = Dang, Darn, "D"

Other Various Mormon Cuss words: Scrud, Gol, fudge puppy, blankety blank

Along with language is pronunciation. Utah has its own dialect of English, and if someone has the dialect, while maybe not Mormon, they have good chances. The most famous example is "Mountain", pronounced by an Utahan as "Mou-in". The "t" sound is actually replaced with a short pause or a beat from the back of the throat.

Names can sometimes be useful for finding out a Mormon. First name like "Mohonri", "Joseph Fielding", and "Brigham" are dead giveaways. Similarly, popular Mormon last names include "Jensen" (Pronounced Jent-siyn), "Smith", and "Christopherson".

Mormons will generally stand out from the crowd by their conduct in social situations. Mormons will usually not drink, cuss, drink caffeine (including coffee and tea), engage in premarital sex, wear revealing clothing, and will not generally tell crude jokes. Of course, there are always exceptions.

If you can't quite figure out ask a question like "Where did you serve your mission?" or "What ward are you in?" If they are not Mormon, these questions are easily recoverable with "I meant in that one video game," and "I thought you were crazy and belonged in the psychiatric ward," respectively.

Log in or registerto write something here or to contact authors.