Inspired by a Gary Larson, to the approximate tune of "Sweet Home Chicago", with apologies

There's a new kind of trouble in your neighborhood
It's spreading everywhere and you know it ain't good
Floppy shoes
Silly clothes
They scare the snot-nosed kiddies with a fake rubber nose

When clowns go bad
When clowns go bad
It's such a disgrace
You get a pie in the face
When clowns go bad

Now they're coming from the circuses and robbing liquor stores
They don't tip the waiters and they're tricking the whores Orange hair
Painted grins
You won't see these bozos juggling bowling pins

When clowns go bad
When clowns go bad
Now ain't it a shame
Barnum & Bailey's is to blame
When clowns go bad

They're mugging blue-haired grannies for their government checks
And all the boys down at precinct are emotional wrecks
Krazy Kars
Polka dots
They're drinking Pabst Blue Ribbon in the church parking lot

When clowns go bad
When clowns go bad
The world's in a mess
If it's coming down to this
And clowns go bad

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