Some years ago a buddy and I went to see a movie. I can’t even remember what the movie was (and it is inconsequential to this story anyway so stop harping on about it would you?). After the movie my friend went to the bathroom while I waited outside and made a general nuisance of myself by muttering things out loud to people going in to see movies. Things along the lines of "You wouldn’t believe it, but he’s Luke’s father", and "It’s great, the chick turns out to really be a guy" and just made-up shit to make people think I’ve spoilt the movie for them.

My friend finally emerges from the bathroom and we proceed out to the carpark. He pulls out of his jumper half a dozen packets of toilet tissue, the kind that comes in a cardboard packet and is hard and waxy to the touch (good for smearing, but not absorbent enough for its intended purpose).

We proceed to drive back to his place, a good half hour away with a decent stretch of 100Km/h road. Once the car is up to its designated speed limit, I wound down all of the windows in the car and start pulling the tissues out of the boxes as fast as I can and throwing them into the air inside the car.

What some people might not realise is that when all four windows of a car are open in a speeding vehicle, it causes an effect where air doesn’t really come into the car, nor does it blow out the windows, it just buffets around in a huge furore inside the car.

About 4 boxes of toilet paper later and the car was full of a massive whirl of flying tissue. My friend could not see for all the paper flying around. It resembled those containers that they put people in for promotions or TV shows where they have to catch the cash blowing around.

A bit of light entertainment, to be encouraged upon your next visit to the movies.

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