I lost you somewhere in the West when you moved away. You never liked to write postcards, I could never stand the sound of my voice on the telephone, so we let the relationship quietly die. Yesterday when I found a letter in my mailbox folded into a makeshift envelope, your name scrawled across the top in large block letters (as if I might forget who you were), it brought back life and light to what I considered to be such a perfect time. I tore it open and read--


i couldn't recall how we met. you never can remember the exact days you meet the people who change the rest of your life forever. later, eating breakfast together, i told you about my theory on spiritual evolution, using the penguin as a model. you laughed and said you understood...you told me a tadpole would be a better example than a penguin because tadpoles actually change in this life.

your little boy

nothing you said could surprise me...it was like i already knew everything about you. there couldn't be any other ones. possessing, but free...

is sprouting ten fingers

you wanted me to tell you how to write (as if i knew how). said you couldn't understand what went wrong...the thoughts were so beautiful in your head but somehow they become mutilated when they touched paper. you thought it was the pen...i told you it was your fingers and advised you to chop them off and grow new ones if you hated them so much.

and shedding his tail

we grew up together, saw each other through pain and passion. you left because you thought you could somehow escape the mental anguish that suffocated you in our town. it was pitiful, and there were tears. amidst the sobs, i tried to explain to you that wherever you went it would follow you, that when you turned around it would still be haunting your every step. you denied it, but i could see the doubt in your eyes, but i hoped that you could somehow lose it amongst the catci and endless desert skies.

And I finally smiled because my little tadpole had made it.

You probably don't realize what you did to me, or what you undid with that sentence--you always had a way of ruining a perfectly sane life with your incoherent babblings--but thank you.

(take that you evil evil nodeshell creators!)

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