I have said and been told by others that we are just friends in various situations. It's usually said at the outset of a relationship that neither party is sure it wants. Or you feel compelled to legitimize yourself when that statement actually is the truth, because most people can't believe in opposite-sex friendships.

One I believe is a half-truth that I say is that I have mostly male friends. In numbers, this is true, but the reasons behind the numbers is that I have always been boy crazy and so to curb my addiction, I turn my crushes into friends. This way I surround myself with cute boys.

(See Look, I don't mean to be an asshole or anything, but...)

  1. Prevaricate.
  2. Change the subject.
  3. Blame.
  4. Make excuses.
  5. Cajole.
  6. Flatter.
  7. Misdirect.
  8. Write a sensitive, self-reprimanding song about the situation.
  9. Write a sensitive, self-reprimanding node about the situation.
  10. Leave town.

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