(nothing swings like weekend sound track)
< Whatever Makes You Happy On A Friday Night... | I will only happen once, ever. >

Ah, Swankyville. It was a bachelor pad through and through, right down to the shrine to Shaft atop the ancient stereophonic turntable set. Pants was the one with the pompadour and the steady following of, perhaps too beautiful, underage women. Mitch kept to himself a lot, but was slowly becoming a connoisseur of stouts and ales. And me? I kept to my two passions: my records and my shaker.

Here are our favorites, here is our Friday night administration. Find a chair, a smoking jacket, a fine cigar. This will take us all night if it has to.


Velocity Curves
by James Hardway

3/4 oz. Pernod
Champagne (any extra dry or sec should do)
lemon juice

This restorative is the perfect way to wash away a hard day, a tough evening, or even prepare for the long night ahead. Just what the doctor ordered.

Pour Pernod into a champagne flute, fill with Champagne, and slowly drizzle in a bit of lemon juice. Start the evening right.


Bolero
by Pink Martini

3/4 oz. vermouth rosso
3/4 oz. white rum
3/4 oz. Calvados or apple brandy

This is an aperitif you can practically feel building to a crescendo while you savor it. You wouldn't want to bruise this delicate beverage with a rigorous shaking, so stir over ice cubes into a mixing glass, and then strain into a chilled cocktail glass. Serve among friends and acquaintences.


Top Floor, Bottom Buzzer
by Morphine

3/4 oz. lemon juice
1 egg white
2 barspoons powdered sugar
dashes sugar syrup
1 1/2 oz. Bourbon
stemmed cherry

This is one to prove you really know how (and when) to use a shaker: just as things are picking up. The rattle of ice cubes should match the beat of the music. Think of it as if you're doing a tango dip. Wake up the beverage, tell it that you love it.

Shake the sour ingredients (you do make your own sour mix, don't you?) and strain into an old-fashioned glass with rocks. Garnish with a cherry. Serve it like Mark Sandman would: "from Boston, at your service."


Sha-La-La (Make Me Happy)
by Al Green

juice of a quarter lime
fruit from a quarter mango
3/4 oz. mango syrup
3/4 oz. white rum

You'll want your blender for this one. Fill with crushed ice and your ingredients. While blending, shake your hips a little bit. This is important. Strain into a large highball glass, fill with crushed ice. Squieeze a lime wedge over the drink and then watch it float, a verdant smile on a pleasant Friday evening cocktail.


Surfboard
by Esquivel!

3/4 oz. dry vermouth
dash orange bitters
dash triple sec
1 1/2 oz. gin
lemon peel

Stir well in a mixing glass filled with ice cubes, strain into a chilled martini glass. Twist lemon peel over drink and drop into the glass. Can you feel the punchiness of the horn hits in this beverage?


Honolulu, Calcutta
by Fantastic Plastic Machine

1/4 oz. lemon juice
dash sugar syrup
dash grenadine
3/4 oz. gin
Champagne

As the evening begins to settle into itself, this highly international drink will help carry you through. Shake the first four ingredients over ice cubes, and strain into a Champagne flute, then fill with the Champagne. Discuss the architecture of the room you're in. Try to ignore the candlelight in the eyes of others.


Hernando's Hideaway
by The Johnston Brothers

1/2 oz. lemon juice
3/4 oz. Rose's lime juice
1 1/2 oz. pineapple juice
3/4 oz. cachaça
3/4 oz. tequila
pineapple

Shake three times over crushed ice in a shaker. As you strain it into a large highball glass half filled with ice, strike a match and whisper low. Garnish with a pineapple slice. Goes well with candlelight.


Brazil
by Geoff Muldaur

1 oz. dry vermouth
1 oz. dry sherry
dashes Pernod

As you stir this beverage between the ice cubes of a mixing glass, think of standing beneath an amber moon and whispering to a long forgotten lover "Someday soon..." Strain into a chilled cocktail glass and enjoy fond memories.


MTV Makes Me Wanna Smoke Crack
by Beck

2 oz. tequila
1/2 oz. crème de cassis
ginger ale
lime

In a collins glass, begin by mixing the entirely wrong ingredients. After a couple of quick stirs, empty the glass and fill with ice, tequila, and cassis. Stir and swing, then fill the rest of the glass with ginger ale. Squeeze a lime wedge over the drink, weed whack that thing.

Now this is smooth.


Same Old Saturday Night
by Frank Sinatra

1 1/2 oz. Scotch
1/2 oz. Drambuie
1 lemon peel

Here's a faithful friend in case nobody has actually come up to the flat for the evening. Mingle the two liquors in a small highball glass, twist and garnish with the lemon peel. This is a fine alternative to waiting for a phone to ring.


Memories Are Made of This
by Dean Martin

1 1/4 oz. vodka
1/4 oz. crème de menthe (white)

Take some sweet and tender vodka, add some stolen creme de menthe. Stir carefully through the days into a small highball glass, see how the flavor stays: these are the dreams you will savor. Serve generously with love.


I Found My Way
by Dusty Springfield

6 fresh mint sprigs, stems cut short
2 sugar cubes
3 oz. bourbon

If you feel you've lost your way, oftentimes the best answer is a mint julep to take the edge off while you ponder a solution. Crush five mint leaves and both sugar cubes in a large highball glass with a pestle. Fill with crushed ice, pour in bourbon, and stir until the solution presents itself. Garnish with a final mint sprig.

It is best when lost to lose yourself, instead, in the hazy days of early summer.


Farewell Blues
by Yoko Kanno and The Seatbelts

1 1/2 oz. cream
dashes Galliano
1/4 oz. blue curaçao
3/4 oz. tequila

This one's for late in the evening, after the numbers have thinned, the noise has dwindled, and the stars are playing tricks on you and your company. Shake this rare delight over ice cubes, and strain into a cocktail glass. Best to accompany this beverage with either a cigarette or a woman who smokes.


Laura's Aura
by Combustible Edison

2 oz. brandy
1 oz. Campari
1 oz. fresh lemon juice

Here's a colorful send off to the rest of the evening, a drink that is simultaneously digestif and aperitif. It's also the last time you'll get to show off, the big finalé. In a shaker full of cracked ice, combine Campari and lemon juice. Shake and strain into a chilled cocktail glass. Meanwhile, heat the brandy in a chafing dish. When warm, ignite the brandy and pour the heart stopping stream of flame into the cocktail glass.

Send your guests off with a wink and a smile and let the evening progress as it may.

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