2/11/00 - It has been quite some time since I was ordained by the Universal Life Church, and I never really put my Reverend powers to any use.
X.- and I lunch at the Pub today, during which she tells me of a Secret Bad Thing she has done. (Not too long ago she mentioned her gynecologist told her she has a very small vagina; she sometimes catches me off guard with her disclosures.) It's kind of heavy, and jeez, I never know what to say, so after a bit of exploration on that topic I lighten up by mentioning my ordination.
She finds this delightfully amusing. Would I officiate if she and her boyfriend decide to marry? "It would be an honor", and I mean it, although I will have to look into New Jersey's requirements to legally officiate.
Can I perform baptism? Yes, there is no legal implication that would require me to be licensed to baptise. "I can even forgive sins", I remark. "I could use some of that!", she replies, referring to her Bad Secret. "Go, then, and sin no more", I intone. She thanks me.
DAMN, that felt good! I had forgotten that I have the power, nay, the religious duty, to extend forgiveness of sins. Here is a power that I have overlooked for far too long. In the U.S. we have the Thanksgiving holiday, but what we really need is an annual Forgiving Day.

Go, and sin no more!

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