Just like the useful How to write an episode of Dukes of Hazzard guide, this guide again proves that you too can be a Hollywood scriptwriter for a top-flight big name TV show. Just follow these simple directions and you can crank out scripts for the classic TV series The A-Team in mere minutes!
The plot of each episode of The A-Team follows a simple procedure. Fill in the blanks in the following paragraph in order to quickly construct your own A-Team episode plot!
The A-Team is hired by (insert name here; use the name of a friend!) to go to (insert unusual location here, perhaps a Middle Eastern nation?) to rescue that person's (insert relationship here; how about girlfriend?) from the evil and insidious (insert villainous name here; how about Butterfinger McFlurry?). The team travels to a small village in this country and is at first beat up by a team of thugs there, then eventually assembles a (insert some sort of vehicle name here, how about a tank?) with lots of guns out of spare parts. (insert A-team member here; how about B.A.?) has a close relationship with one of the villagers and gives an inspirational speech convincing the villagers to fight; the villain is then defeated.
Feel free to continually reuse this template; NBC did it for four years with great success in the 1980s!
Hannibal is the crusty leader of the team. Be sure to pillage quotes for him from classic films about great leaders such as Gandhi or Patton, and change a few words; no one will know the difference. Make sure Hannibal celebrates any victory, large or small, by smoking a cigar; it helps to establish his "character."
Murdoch is the comic relief of the show. Make sure he gets a few funny lines, and if you can't think of anything funny, having Murdoch randomly quote other pop culture things, such as lyrics from popular songs, will work. Murdoch is "crazy," so don't forget to start each episode by having the team breaking Murdoch out of the Veteran's Hospital! He is also useful for coming up with solutions to problems that seem to have no real solution; feed him any inane plan you come up with and have him state it. Hannibal, being the "crusty leader," will say "You know, that just might work," and then the problem is solved!
B.A. is the star of the show (Mr. T), so you need to have him on camera as often as possible. Having him seem "friendly," given his gruff demeanor, is a nice way to make everyone smile and feel good about themselves, so having B.A. bond with the villagers always works, especially with children! To give his character "depth," make sure to remember that he is afraid of flying; each episode can have a unique way of knocking B.A. out so the team can fly!
Face is simply there to fix only the biggest of logical gaps in your script. When the team travels a great distance in a few minutes, let it be because Face drove them there in his car. When the team breaks into a well-guarded building, let it be because Face, master of disguise that he is, infiltrated the hideout. Always make sure that no matter what, Face looks freshly scrubbed as he is the "handsome" male to attract a female audience!
The team has a distinctive black and red van which must be shown off at all times; it is the most expensive of the toys in your toy line! After all, we want every kid in America to ask for one of these for Christmas, don't we? Make sure that the van does things that are essentially impossible and can be added as a "feature" to the toy with little or no cost: "stealth" is a great feature to show off without having any extra cost on producing this "must-have" toy!
The military police
When you need to write an exciting cliffhanger at season's end, just re-watch the beginning of the show: the supervillain is already laid out for you! Merely have the team be cornered or nearly captured by the military police to end the episode, then have the team conduct a crafty escape to start the next season! Guaranteed ratings!
Congratulations! You now have the knowledge to write episodes for one of the most successful TV series of all time! With this skill, there's no limit to the amount of "quality television programming" you can produce!