Ah, the wonders of the Bible Belt.

It seems that the wonderful and moral state of Georgia (my current residence) has decided that vibrators and dildos are obscene, and thus, illegal.


That's right! According to part 16-12-80, section C of the Official Code of Georgia:

"any device designed or marketed as useful primarily for the stimulation of human genital organs is obscene material under this Code section."

WAIT JUST A MINUTE! Are you telling me that my penis is illegal?! It is, of course, a device designed primarily for the stimulation of human female genital organs! (Penises aren't designed for reproduction, they are simply the tools to facilitate reproduction! Of course, reproduction is the final result, but how do you think you get there?)

Now, I'm a firm believer (no pun intended) in the thought that what you do in the privacy of your home is your own business. I also believe that devices used for "the stimulation of human genital organs" shouldn't be used in public. But what right does the state have to tell people how to enjoy themselves in private?

Don't get me wrong, I don't use dildos. They wouldn't exactly work on me. Hell, I don't use sex toys of any kind. But I'm sure there are quite a few females out there who find joy in such a device, and by golly, they should be granted the right to use them in any state of their choosing! The reason I'm putting together this writeup is because I see the hilarity behind such an idiotic law. This ranks right up there with the Georgia law stating that it is illegal to purchase alcohol on a Sunday.

(Don't use a dildo while having a beer on Sunday! Hoo Boy, you'd be in some serious trouble then!)

Section F states:

"(f) A person who commits the offense of distributing obscene material shall be guilty of a misdemeanor of a high and aggravated nature."

Now since vibrators have been deemed obscene according to the same code, if you give one to a friend as a gift, You're goin' to Jail!

Sure, aggravated assault with a dildo could justify jail time. But using it for its *intended* purpose? You'd think this was funny, but the Attorney General's Office is enforcing this law bigtime. Many retail shops have been raided, and several people have been arrested.

And now, we turn to the court transcript, paraphrased by Dr. Sandor Gardos, (The same Dr. Gardos from here) acting as an expert witness for a court case regarding a man charged with selling vibrators to consenting adults.

DA: Professor Doctor Gardos, will you please tell the court what is shown in photograph "State's Exhibit 3-B"?

Gardos: Uh, that looks to be a dildo.

DA: And what kind of dildo is it?

Gardos: It looks like it is designed to be attached to a person's chin via ear straps.

DA: And, is there an inscription on the box?

Gardos: Yes.

DA: And what might it say?

Gardos: "Fuck and please her like never before with the Stimulator!"

DA: Now, Professor Doctor Gardos, you stated that these devices have therapeutic value. Is that correct?

Gardos: Yes.

DA: And have you ever prescribed a device similar to this one?

Gardos: Uh, no, I must admit that I have never prescribed that a patient to attach a dildo to his or her chin.

Your tax dollars at work.

You can find the Official Code of Georgia detailing the specifics here:

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