The International Feminist Conspiracy
has acquired nuclear weapons
. Hillary Clinton
snuck a round dozen warheads
out of the Oval Office
in her purse when nobody was looking. Those liberals are sneaky like that
Pursuant to paragraph 9, page 43 of The Feminist Agenda
Press, 1971) they intend to kill off every man on Earth except for Alan Alda
and Charles Nelson Reilly
. When the Agenda
was composed, Andy Warhol
, Truman Capote
, and Moshe Dayan
were on the list as well, but they checked out early.
Our only hope is constant vigiliance
! If we're watching, then they'll be, like, scared to try anything.