The UMass library is the tallest library in the world -- 26 stories -- and I'm rappelling out the window of the 22nd story from a guitar string. You see, I dropped my trusty Symbol barcode reader, which I've been using to attempt to find this book by Madeline L'Engle, from which I need to quote a particular passage in order to gain entrance to the steam tunnels beneath the building.

See, Amherst has these building-size requirements, but UMass gets around the restrictions by connecting buildings with tunnels and claiming they're just one building. The library is a connected to a two other buildings by a bridges, a common basement, and an underground tunnel. The tunnel is never used, for some reason, and it's brightly lit and there's just so much empty space... There's also two more tunnels on campus but they're not nearly as long (1000 feet) or as brightly lit and clean.

I like those empty, abandoned places... knowing that where I am is totally public, and yet nobody will bother me here, that I can be alone here.

I was in the car with my dad, but the cars were different, they drove on a track like a roller coaster. Suddenly my blue jacket gets pulled off and we stop at some rest stop of sorts. My mom is there and she argues with my dad about going back or not. Apparently we needed to make time. I told them that I had plenty of other jackets at home and that we should go. This faded, followed by another dream

I was on my schoolbus and I am constantly making jokes to my friend Chris about how Armani died, none make sense now. Then I write "FOR FREE PORN go to http://goatse.cx" on the bus seat. When I look back at it, it has "you are a bad boy" written under it in girly handwriting.

The dreadful six months in Tijuana:

The dream was almost entirely about a girl I know, who was at a party last night. I had a one-day affair, much like that first day when you and her realize you both like each other a lot. We kissed lots, all while playing hard-to-get, just for fun. Then she told me she was going to Tijuana for six months, for some sort of internship. I was devastated. I was sad. I was a dumbass who didn't think to ask if I could go along. Instead, I told her I'd maybe try to visit sometime. It was ok, though, because we knew we wanted each other when she got back.

I spent the rest of the dream trying to figure out how to get to Tijuana. I travelled by motorcycle to Germany, and the motorcycle was having difficulties driving straight. Instead, it would lose traction and spontaneously spin around, although it never fell over. Driving through a tunnel into Germany was odd, as we kept having to stop. Something to do with making sure everyone was driving on the right side of the road.

My sister was on some sort of job in Germany, although that seemed to have really been a job at Woolworth's. I went to see her, and was tailed in by her ex and his gang, who promptly tried to get me in trouble by making the store employees believe I was shoplifting. My sister was there, though, so they failed. I convinced my sister to buy food so we could make dinner.

So I finally made it to Tijuana, and found her working at some sort of convenience store, although it looked really high-class, because the whole thing was empty and had very subtle interior decor. I tried to convince her to spend some time with me, but I had taken too long to get there and she wasn't interested anymore.

If that's not a hint from my subconscious, I don't know what is.

I was some kind of super hero. Not a regular super hero, a crappy one. I was really agile and good at kicking peoples' asses, while being almost impervious to pain, kind of like Wolverine without claws. That's not the really weird part though. The other superheroes and I lived together in this really sparse dorm like place in really close quarters, I think I was doing some superhero stuff before I went there, it's a little hazy. We were all really poor and actually stole to get by. I think most of us were university students, but there were a few that were younger or older. I had a close friend who was a boy who looked a lot like me sometimes (tall, thin) and a girl others, I think he/she could change form or something. We all wore fairly normal clothes, mostly light and cheap in medium earth tones, except some sort of accessory that was like weird magical raindow colours. Some people had glasses of the sort, some had bracelets or pins. I think I had a saxaphone shaped pin.

We were all in the country for some sort of field trip/badguy ass kicking session and I remember having a conversation with someone about ditching the rest of the group and living in one of the abandoned houses (there were a bunch of them around). I decided instead that I would just leave and strike out on my own with the aforementioned friend and my dog (who I addressed by the same name as my cat). The dream ended as I was walking down a dirt road, penniless, eating a handful of candy for breakfast (I was eating it slowly, since it was all i had and I wanted it to last).



This all disturbed me a lot.

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