Soup - more specifically I'd like to recommend Campbell's Condensed Cream Of Mushroom Soup, a tin of which is a wonderful thing to have in the cupboard.

The Lizard's Lazy Lunch

The instructions on the soup tin advise diluting it with a cans-worth of water; this is not only wrong, it is downright cowardly.

The correct technique is to mix it with a cans-worth of Semi-skimmed milk (or half-milk/half-water if you're a wuss), then very gently heat (stirring continuously) in a saucepan, and don't let it boil (it'll go all icky if it does).

While heating, prepare some toast (I suggest 4 thick slices of fresh-ish Granary bread), which should be toasted until fairly dark and crunchy, before being buttered liberally and cut into soldiers.

Garnish soup with ground pepper (to taste) and fresh parsley (in the highly unlikely event that you have some to hand*).

Eat (optionally straight from saucepan if v.lazy).

Wash bowl, spoon, plate and saucepan immediately after eating (the soup's a bugger to get off the saucepan if you leave it to dry), and return to whatever geeky task you were doing before spending 3 minutes off making lunch.

Footnote: The above dish is equally yummy if you substitute Campbell's Condensed Cream Of Tomato soup instead (although, of course I hate tomatoes) - a soup also favoured by the late Andy Warhol - he only painted those cans because had loads lying around after following my lunch recipe.

(* let's face it, if you had those sorts of nice fresh things lying around the house you wouldn't be eating toast & soup, would you?)

The instructions on a can of Campbell's Tomato Soup tell you to use one can of water to one can of soup. Doing so will yield a reddish fluid very similar to watered-down ketchup (or catsup, I guess). If this is your thing, fine. If not, what you really want to do is use a can of milk instead. This yields a rich, creamy soup that is absolutely delicious.

Things you can put in tomato soup that taste good:

Nothing makes a rainy day at home more enjoyable than a big jigsaw puzzle, some tomato soup, and a grilled cheese sandwich to dip in it. Mmmm.

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