Television Network formed by the "merger" of the British Satellite Broadcasting, BSB and Sky Television owned by Rupert Murdoch. It now has gone digital with Sky Digital

OK, so I used to work for them, also in one of their call centres, in fact, the same one as cerberus. And I used to perceive the company as evil too, but now I've left I see it in a somewhat different light.

Basically, the things that I remember most from my time with the company are the funny things. The things that at the time are really stupid or wierd but now just fall into the 'surely nobody could be that stupid' category.

One of the favourite pastimes of the operators seems to be a game of "you'll never guess what some stupid cow said on the phone this morning". Especially in the smoke room. One call that I took that happened to fall in to that category also happened to be one of my first.

It was my first day on the floor, fresh out of training. The phone bleeps and the call is connected. Its some woman calling Sky Technical because her remote control isn't working. I enquire in that ever so polite manner that all call centre staff have when they have just finished training what the problem was. She tells me that 'its just not working'. After about ten minutes of this she eventually says 'its not working because the dog ate it'. So now I'm instantly stumped and have to stick my hand in the air to ask my Team Leader what to do. Paul just kind of laughed and told me to tell her that dog-eaten remote controls aren't covered by the warranty and she'd have to pay £20 for a replacement. Needless to say she wasn't best chuffed at this. So she screams at me for a while. Then she comes out with the phrase "I'm a lawyer and I know what my rights are". At which point I think that I've had enough of this. But we're not allowed to hang up on callers. So I get Paul to take over the call. And she screams at him for like, half an hour. He couldn't get a word in edge-ways. Eventually he loses the plot and kind of accidentally, honestly, didn't mean to, manages to press the Release button. Then he feels really guilty and stalks off down to front desk to tell them that there was a technical failure of my telephone and the call was lost. Then the stupid prat phones her back!!!! I couldn't believe it.

I mean, what sort of dog did she have to eat a Sky remote control? They're not exactly compact are they? I have visions of this woman picking up her dog and squeezing its belly to change channel, tweaking its right ear to access the EPG and pulling its tail to switch it off!!

Thats one that really sticks in my mind. There are plenty of others but thats another story.....

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