Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "And if I ever catch those little bastards that thought up the Internet, then what I did to the security guard outside is gonna look like paradise by comparison!"

• Those who look for meaning in the world are like travellers seeking wood in the shade of a forest
• The loneliness of migrant threshermen and those poor souls forced by fate to seafaring slept under the loveseat; little Jenna smiled at its tail cat-like aquiver
• What did Jesus look like?
• If the only sexual organ you have is a penis then everything looks like a vagina
• It looks like a tourism brochure photo from up here
• he looks a little like you... so i would rather talk about other pretty girls
• The Man Felt an Iron Hand Grasp Him by the Hair, at the Nape. Not One Hand, a Hundred Hands Seized Him, Each by the Hair, and Tore Him Head to Foot, the Way You Tear Up a Sheet of Paper, Into Hundreds of Little Pieces
• And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music
• cards written by those paid to condense their thoughts and emotions
• She didn't write like Emily Dickinson, but she did live in a house overlooking a cemetery, and I guess he thought that was important.
• What's she gonna look like with a chimney on her?
• If the only tool you have is a hammer, then everything looks like a nail
• I paved paradise, and put up this, like, bigass parking lot
• I don't like the looks of those teenagers
• Those who are as a light in the darkness shall ever be troubled by moths
• Nothing like a crazy uncle to look up to
• Those little golden birdies, look at them.
• they look up at the same night sky, they fill their heart with the same dreams, and they are infused with the breath of life by the same almighty creator
• How did the matrix know what blue looked like?
• Did you mean for it to look like this?
• Did You Ever Have to Make Up Your Mind?
• If you EVER come across an empty floor, just know that I'm gonna fuck you up.
• sometimes i go outside and stand in the sun and look up at the sky and pretend i'm a tree
• feeling like a failure by meeting goals
• We were all waiting to hear those words (and no one ever said them)
• i don't spend a lot of time thinking about what it feels like to be gored by a chainsaw
• She was most amazed by the obvious, like January and the fact that I could not possibly keep her.
• Playing Risk is like arguing on the internet. Even if you win, you're still retarded.
• Never Gonna Give You Up
• What it's like to be raided by the FBI
• As a matter of fact I did invent the Internet
• Saint Paul did not screw up Christianity
• dirty little nodes that other people might not ever see
• I like to take up space
• I thought paper cuts were like lightning
• She came through the glass door, untouched by the storm that raged outside.
• You meant for this node to be read by me, and I would like to respond
• She was the cutest necromancer I ever did see
• We all gonna end up meeting at the finishing line
• Every morning when I wake up, I feel guilty for all the things I have ever been
• what will the internet be like five hundred years from now?
• Throw your hands (up) in the air, (and) wave them all around like you (just) don't care
• before the internet when teen had REAL relationship the boy could look at the girl and judge the diameter of her thorax with his feelers and determine whether the mating ritual could commence but NO MORE. evil woman use her computer sorcery
• I'm gonna be sad and then I want you to make me laugh
• Pulling yourself up by your own bootstraps
• why I like fat bastards
• These women who must live like the high Sierra white pine, fed somehow by the alpine wind
• No one has ever been bitten to death by a poisonous snake in a ball pit
• haunted by nodeshells, like pronouns signifying other worlds
• by people who know what salsa should taste like
• I did not tell him, instead I kept it private like a secret hug
• one by one their blades will grind to a halt and stand still like a white forest.
• We did not make this up
• Where the heck did those Hobbits come from
• Tolkien did not like magic
• I woke up in a bed I did not know
• To catch my flailing second thoughts
• Days go by like sweet summer breeze; I don't know I... can't feel them anymore
• If my roommate doesn't keep his hands off my shit, I'm gonna fuck him up
• How can one ever go home? Bangkok, Tokyo, Chicago, then Cleveland
• The Internet is like crack, only worse
• We gonna party like it's 1999 (e2poll)
• The coolest I've ever felt, given that I didn't end up with a gun.
• Painting a rock to make it look more like a rock
• No point in mentioning the bats, I thought. Poor bastard will see them soon enough.
• Internet Security Association and Key Management Protocol
• Psst, you look like your sternum collapsed
• it looks like rain
• Be a model or just look like one
• Have you ever thought
• I am the princess guarded by dragons, snorting and grumbling and rumbling in wagons
• And our cars all jumped forward like bottles on a table thumped by a drunk
• By morning I will have erased all traces that I was ever here
• We're gonna find the bastard and "reward" him.
• Those Poor Bastards
• Sewn up by frost
• On A Tree By A River, A Little Tom-Tit
• those touched by demons
• A little Clint Black never killed anybody, but it did evacuate the building.
• They did not forgive us, she thought. We will surely die.
• Climb up on the Moon? Of course we did.
• Men did not always like large breasts
• drum rudiments which sound like they were named by a neural net
• When did I lose my brave little soul?
• All you ever did was let it happen
• What did my spleen ever do for me?
• When You Were Little Did You Wonder
• you never thought this would happen to you, but it did
• Where did I put those darn tomatoes?
• This place like an old jacket, made alien by time.
• Thoughts overheard by the morning
• Do you mind if I crash on yr stained glass couch for, like, ever?
• Well if it's gonna be THAT kinda party, then I'm gonna stick my dick in the mashed potatoes!
• The boss ain't gonna like this
• i cannot ever have you, not even in thoughts.
• Seven opening lines if he would ever look me in the eye
• security guard
• I'm sure gonna miss those brain cells
• fuck it, I love you even if I'm gonna feel like shit
• Marine Corps Security Guard Duty
• Internet Security
• If the real world were like the internet
• Logan, the weird video store security guard
• One more look at the ghost before I'm gonna make it leave
• Up, because the sky has room for us and more than we can ever make
• My tribe are those who built the Internet
• Firewalls and Internet Security
• I never thought it would be like this
• It looks like you are writing a letter
• What Does Your Soul Look Like
• Tricks girls use to look like they swallow
• Internet Security Act of 2000
• The ghosts of those words hung over us like clouds
• Good girls who look like bad girls
• Never look like you're staring
• Don't kill your invisible husband to see what he looks like or you'll sob your heart out. But don't worry about the millions of invisible men coming to attack your village because they won't kill you if you don't know how to fight them.
• Mommy, why are those ducks wrestling like that?
• The Next Little Letter: The Vowels of the Internet
• The U.S. Post Office: Benign little organization, or the linchpin of the greatest conspiracy ever?
• Being tickled in the neck by a girl you know a little bit
• Spice up your life by attending strip clubs
• She wakes me up by tickling my feet
• When she was new, she rolled around the sky like a black umbrella blown by the wind
• to those killed by the Firestone tires
• How the Internet came to be: On use by other networks
• What it's like to be questioned by the FBI
• Three Puerto Rican girls walked by like accordion music under the trees, looking like they'd accept nothing less than perfection.
• Speech given by the Israeli ambassador at the U.N to the Security Council on September 15, 2003
• Shards of memory stirred up by the wind
• By the way, those chairs, they spin
• There is no weirdness like the weirdness of a novel written by a mathematician
• Looking up a word by its definition
• What do you mean by 'that pomegranate looks promising'?!
• Outside the Circle of Trust: A Guide for Teens Untrusted by Parents
• Or he'll just kick me in the face and scream abstract noises and dance around outside in his underwear and have sex with the neighbor's dog and try to fly by jumping off the toilet
• By evening I will have returned all traces that I was ever here
• The Laws of Thought by George Boole,
• On getting blown up 8000 miles from home by a man who does not own shoes
• watching headlights roll by, maybe you noticed one, swept by a little too slow
• Only by spreading rights to others do we ensure those rights for ourselves.
• By morning I will have erased all traces that I was ever a bear
• And then by the side of the road, I saw
• So then I tried staring into the abyss, but it got distracted by a weasel and ditched me
• Thoughts provoked by a new chair
• A men's Oxford, sleeves messily turned up to the elbows, held together by wishful thinking
• Catch my tumbling thoughts and place them next to a spoon
• You will know me by those colors, deep and bold, of the heart you never knew.
• Woken up by footsteps of people who weren't there
• The dumbest thing I ever did while under the influence of alcohol
• Then what did Jesus say, grandpa?
• Entropy catches up with all of us
• He did very little harm
• the garden did not start out as metaphor, it started out as paradise
• How did I end up here?
• One of these days the cops will catch up with me
• Do you understand what you are, sir, in love? You've been lost at sea, and picked up by a lone stranger on an anchored and recently near-abandoned ghost ship.
• He comforted me when he thought I needed it, but never when I really did
• risk assessment in the brain and the dumbest thing you ever did before age 25
• he did not look back. he walked slowly. he might stop at any time.
• Did you think I would give up that easily?
• When did my fiance turn into my security blanket?!
• did you ever wonder (user)
• Did it ever make you cry ?
• i mean honestly what did the dodo ever do for us
• Those torpedo bombers didn't do a darn thing did they
• did you add up all the cards left to play
• When scientists make mistakes they see what they did wrong and then try again.
• When I was little my mother told me not to sit close to the T.V., so when I was six I did.
• An Amateur Researcher's Look at Misconceptions Portrayed by 50 Shades of Grey
• Sorrier than I ever thought I would be
• like nothing ever was
• Why can't the Democrats ever think up this kind of sleazy shit?
• Have you ever seen a despot with a little nose?
• This guy tipped his waitress a dollar with a dick drawn on it. What happened next left me questioning everything I ever thought about income inequality.
• Things are more like they are now than they ever were before
• dr's Hospital Adventure : nurses put up with more than you can ever realize
• Longing for brief, but ever unattainable moment of... lucid thought?

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