I was twelve. He was fifteen. We'll go as slow or as fast as you like, he said. I was too young to know what he meant.
We were going steady the next day. Never told anyone. I wasn't supposed to have a boyfriend.
I was thirteen. He was sixteen. You'll like it, he said, I promise.
I didn't. At all.
She's lying to you, he said. They're all lying to you. I know I've made some mistakes, but I'm really sorry. They're just jealous of us. I love you. You have to believe me.
I did.
I was fourteen. He was seventeen. Happy early birthday, he said, I couldn't wait.
It fit right on my left ring finger. But it did funny things to my skin. My finger hurt.
You need to get some more interesting bras, he said, I can drive you to Victoria's Secret.

Can I have a blow job?
Will you give me a blow job?
Please...
I'd really like a blow job.
PLEASE...
Oh.
I can't wait to get a blow job.
When will you give me a blow job?
I never pressured you into anything.

I was so lonely this weekend when you were at that party with your friends, he said, I couldn't take it.
Will you give me a blow job?
Who are you emailing? It's Nick again, he said, I knew it, why do you keep talking to him? Nick is such a jerk, I swear he's stalking you, he said.
I'm sorry I told Owen to fuck off, he said, but he was standing so close to you.
I'd really like a blow job.
All right, I guess it might be good to have some space for a little while, he said. He was crying.
So, are you going out with anyone? he said.
I was going out with Nick.
I'm going to kill him, he said, how could you go out with the only person in this world that I hate?
I'm dying, he said, I need someone to take care of me until I go to college.
I wouldn't.
I was fifteen. He was seventeen.
I've been talking with Amy about you, he said, I've told her what a slut you are. Oh, he said, and they were never really lying to you or jealous of you a year and a half ago, I just didn't want to tell you the truth.
I left, and I laughed very hard.

I am sixteen. He is eighteen.
It's been a while, he says. College is fun, I'm on the fencing team here, apparently I have a lot of potential, so I'm working to be the best, close to three hours every day, and probably within a year or two I'll be starting on the men's sabre team.
It would be nice if you would drop me an e-mail when you get a chance, he says, but I'm sure that you still probably don't like me.

No shit.

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