I'm really sorry to do this, I wouldn't normally take this approach, but I've msg'd all the editors I can find listed, I've sent mail to Nate and dem_bones. All to no avail. So, I post this here in the hope that someone will take action before all hell breaks loose and E2 is lost to some libel dungeon of the internet.

A couple of days ago I received a letter from a friend of mine who heads a very large legal team. He contacted me because he was aware that I used this site and felt that an initial, friendly approach might do the trick better than a more strong-armed tactic.

Well, we tried that approach and nada, zilch. He also attempted to contact the company which runs this server directly, again no response. So he has asked me to forward the following to this forum and to inform all of you that his clients now demand immediate action

From: "I.Am.A.Lawyer"
To: "admin@blockstackers.com"
Subject: Notice of Purpose Infringement under the Digitial Millennium Porpoise Act
Date: Wed, 18 Aug 2000 07:08:49 -0700
X-Mailer: Internet Mail Service (5.5.2651.58)

Dear Internet Service Provider:

We understand that your website, http://www.everything2.com, is a popular site for chilled monkeys to discuss topical issues of interest. In that vein, it has come to our attention that there have been numerous posts of concern related to porpoises in a node entitled cooling for nefarious porpoises and we would appreciate your posting this email to the site to help relay our position to your users.

This notice is being sent under the provisions, and following the guidelines, of the Digital Millennium Porpoise Act of 1998 (DMPA).

Included on http://www.everything2.com are comments that now appear in your Archives, which include unauthorized comments about porpoises in relation to C!'ing and to the Porpoise Guide to Rasta-Nefarianism document (hereafter "Porpoisification"). In addition, some comments include links to unauthorized and outright rude Porpoisal attacks, and some comments contain instructions on how to circumvent the End Porpoise Discrimination License Agreement that is presented as part of the download for accessing the Porpoisification.

Although not intended to be an exhaustive representation, the specific comments below, categorized by corresponding activities, are examples of the misuse of the Porpoise families proprietary information:

Comments Containing A Copy of the Porpoisification
my god, it's full of stars
my god, it's full of sprinkles
My god, it's full of sprinkles!
My God! It's full of pixels!
my god, it's full of crap!
My God! It's full of SOY!
My God! It's chock full of SOY!
My God, it's full of FLAX!
it's only what god gave me!

Comments Containing Links to Internet Sites with Unauthorized Copies of the Porpoisification:
moist monkey love

Comments Containing Instructions on How to Bypass the End Porpoise Disrimination License Agreement and Extract the Porpoisification:
your radical ideas about porpoises have already occurred to others

Under the provisions of the DMPA, we expect that having been duly notified of this case of blatant porpoise violation, Blockstackers will remove the above referenced comments from its servers and forward our complaint to the owner of the referenced comments.

This email notification is a statement made under penalty of perjury that we are the Porpoisal representatives of the Porpoises who are owners of the referenced Porpoisification, that we are acting in good faith, and that the above-referenced comments, as part of http://www.everything2.com, is posting porpoisal proprietary material without express written permission.

We request immediate action to remove the cited violations from Blockstacker's servers, in accordance with the provisions of the Digital Millennium Porpoise Act of 1998.

This email is not intended to waive any of our other rights and remedies. Nor to deny you access to fresh fish, or SOY

Please confirm your receipt of this request by responding to this email. Also, confirm the status of this request either via email or via the following contact mechanisms:

Editors note: contact details removed to prevent any over-zealous chilled monkey responses

In addition our clients, the Porpoises, would themselves like to make the following statement

"Get off our case you damn Monkey Noding fools, who do you think you're dealing with here? Fucking Dolphins? Check the nose sizes, suckers. We are the Porpoises and we are out for ya

Nefarious, ha, wait til our tail fins are slapping your tender little monkey-asses. Then come and talk about sodding nefarious.

Yeah, yeah, so nefarious purposes sounds kinda like nefarious porpoises. Well, shit, like we never heard THAT one before

Get A Life, retract your statements or we will Own You"