Much mystery surrounds the death of Immanuel Kant, the famous German philosopher. I will try to explain his untimely death.

It is well known that Kant met his maker in the United States, less known that it was near a high security federal compound.

On the night of his expiry, Kant was touring the East Coast on a drinking spree with some friends, when he had to pee. He stopped the car, and stumbled into the forest to bleed his lizard. In his inebriated state, after urinating, he could not find his way back to the vehicle. So he wandered around, and by chance found himself opposite a large African American soldier. This is the transcription of the dialogue.

	Soldier (A.A.): “Halt”.
	I.K.: “Ja”
	A.A.: “Sir! Do you know you are on U.S. property?”
	E.K.: “Ja”
	A.A.: “Can you tell me your name, Sir?”
	E.K.: “Kant”
	A.A.: “I said, SIR!!! Can you or can you NOT tell me your NAME? SIR!!!?”
	E.K: ”Kant”
	A.A.: “SIR!!!!! I am afraid you must TELL ME YOUR NAME”
	E.K: “I am sorry, you don’t understand my accent? Kant, kunt.”
        A.A.: “Sir! Tell me your name or I will be forced to discharge this here AK47, SIR!”
	E.K.: “The mind does not get its laws from nature, but DICTATES them to nature.”
	A.A.: “Eat hot lead.”