Pot instead of job - why didn't someone suggest this to me long ago? I used the cool screwdriver I stole from work to take apart my old crap useless-even-for-parts-probably computer. All the tiny parts. Silver and bronze, all covered in thick black soot, rub it away with a damp paper towel, see the gleams come out from underneath the grime. Blue and green circuitry, wonderful like a map, like the earth seen from the air. Tracks and roads and destinations. Who knows how to put so many tiny pieces together to make something work? genius, genius, incomprehensible, I love all these pieces though I don't know their names.

Paper towel has blood on it. Stare. So so red. Where did it come from? Whose blood has been lurking inside this monitor? How did it stay so liquid so red? Oh - sliced my hand open on an edge. A little pain, not much, wipe the red away and watch it come back, it always does, taking care of me.

eventually (soon) I had to stop because my brain wouldn't slow down enough for my hand to partner with.

crazy is when your brain shifts over from where they expected it to be / making up visions

Encouraged to fight them, you could win. No one had taught him he could fight against those.

Patrick ---> Patch, we could call him that

All you have to do, to learn, is to love it and the knowledge will come rushing in like a tide.

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