So my birthday isn't officially until the 30th but we'd be at my parent's place by then. So it was today, Thursday that we had the party. It was... fun. But my feelings are confusing. On one hand, if I could do it again, I'd stay sober, on the other hand, a few things happened that might not have had I been sober and I don't want to take those things back. It's interesting.
I still feel the same.
The only real change is a conviction to never drink again. Seems it's not just a low tolerance, my body just rejects the alcohol. But beyond that I guess is a small change in how I perceive others. This was the first time we'd thrown a party and the first time I had seen a lot of my friends in that kind of setting. Learned my friends are great. Took care of us who got sick and passed out, even cleaned up the one who made a mess, which really should have been the hosts job and it makes me feel bad and grateful.
I feel different right now but I probably won't later. Though birthdays are handy markers they are not the real milestones in growing up. The real milestones are harder to identify as they happen. Only in hindsight do you realize how much you;ve changed. Welp, soon enough pretty much every freedom besides holding certain political offices will be open to me. That'll be fun later when I have the money to indulge.
And Time passes.