Too many parodies of this already exist, I know. But someone mis-subtitled a well-known movie scene as a quasi-sequel to the short film Uprising Of The Scout.

April 22, 2010

A uniformed officer steps through an office door, closing it behind him, and works his way to the middle of a group of twenty or so more men, similarly clad. The camera goes wide to reveal a man seated at a desk in front of them, a map spread out before him. General Hans Krebs is standing at the front of the group, reaching towards the map.

"The Scout Team have made a breakthrough. The Scout has been sighted on the side of buildings here, here and here." He paused before motioning towards the map again. "And also he has been seen riding some sort of homemade skateboard along here."

The camera orbits left, tracking Krebs' hand. It comes to rest perpendicular to the original angle, and we realise as it does so that the seated man being addressed is Adolf Hitler. Krebs straightens, and Hitler raises his hand from the table, palm upturned in a questioning gesture.

"But I presume Steiner will stop him."

General Wilhelm Burgdorf is shown at the back of this shot, looking nervously sideways at Krebs, whose brow can clearly be seen to be sweating. Burgdorf is standing to the right of Hitler's desk, and is invisible in wider shots. Krebs stands rigidly, staring straight ahead.

"Mein Fuhrer... Steiner..."

He swallows a lump in his throat, but is unable to continue. Generaloberst Alfred Jodl, standing just to his right, finishes the sentence.

"Steiner fell off a bridge after being rickrolled."

Hitler continues to stare at the map. He begins quivering. With shaking hand, he removes his glasses. His voice however, is calm and steady.

"Anyone who can't climb a building, leave the room."

Viewed again from behind and just above the Fuhrer, the room empties bar the three men who had been standing closest the front of the desk - Jodl, Krebs and Keitel - Reichsminister Joseph Goebbels and Reichsleiter Martin Borman, who are standing to the left of and just behind him, and Burgdorf to his right. Borman rolls his eyes upward as the last of the ineligibles vacates the room, Goebbels has his eyes fixed on nothing in the corner of the room opposite him, and Krebs is still looking down at the map. The door closes, and the camera cuts back to the Fuhrer. His voice is a bellowing explosion, and his hands madly wave a pencil and ruler.

"That was an order! Steiner is an incompetent moron! Fell off a bridge? How hard can it be to catch this person?"

A woman sobs outside the conference room. The Fuhrer's voice can be heard distinctly, and all listen in tensed silence.

"He climbs buildings, can't you just make him fall off? Nobody seems to be able to get at him, not even the SS!"

The stereo-swapping drum beat sequence internet users dread to hear begins to play, and Hitler jumps to his feet, looking around the room.

"And now he's in our ceiling space!. Are you all really this incompetent?"

His words can barely be heard over the music that is now clearly recognisable if it wasn't after the first bar. Burgdorf looks awkwardly at his feet.

"Mein Fuhrer, I cannot hear you over this excellent music."

All in the room turn to stare at Burgdorf as the Fuhrer raises his voice even louder.

"Somebody go and shut that up! Blow up the fusebox if you have to!"

Suddenly Hitler is seated again, head hanging, as Rick begins to sing.

♫ We know the game, and we're gonna play it. ♫

The Fuhrer shakes his head, an expression of despair clearly visible on his face, his words drowned by the singer's.

"I don't think we will ever catch him. Just get out of here before you make anything worse."

The song fades, video to black with it. And it's such a happy song.

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