Bing is at the Lake Place.
The family took him in the car. He is really impatient at first, but as the trip progresses, he remembers the Lake Place and starts to get excited.
He does some bouncing. "Lake Place? Are we going to Lake Place?"
The family, as usual, don't understand a word. They are excited though, especially the two girls. The adults have all their usual angst. Jay zues. The girls are excited and the camping gear is in the car.
And they are at Lake Place. Bing is ecstatic. They tie him up in the lot by the boats. He bounces anyhow. "FUNGK! LAKE PLACE! I LOVE THIS FUNGKING PLACE!"
The family loads all of the camping gear in a boat. They finally let Bing get in. "FUNGK, I am so excited." Bing licks himself for a while to calm himself. Then he tries to stand on the bow. The girls argued about who got to ride on the bow and the older one is sulking. He bounces her to cheer her up. She resists, but then they are getting near the Point. She perks up.
They land and start pulling gear out. Bing is shaking. "SNOOPY! FUNGKING SNOOPY! I haven't seen you in ages, you old fungker. How the hell are you?"
They let him off the leash. He bounces Snoopy, but tries to be gentle. Snoopy is fucking getting old. Gee Zues. Snoopy is glad to see him. Oh, and fungk! There's that black lab, what the fungk is his name? He hopes Snoopy will fill him in. Bounce a bit to cover.
"Dudes! Hunting! Fungk, let's go!" He tears around.
"Calm down, Bing." says Snoopy. "Mellow out. Let your family set up the fungking tents." Lots of the other people are down helping carry the gear to the camp site. That Nook place. Bing helps. The Mom yaps at him as usual. She has less fungking sense of humor than any of the family. 'Course, she is the one who puts out the food usually even though the girls are supposed to. He grins at her. She is fungking happy to be at the Lake Place too.
Tents are up. "HUNT!" Howls Bing and they are off. Oh, man, the smells are to die for. Why the family doesn't stay here year round, Bing just can't figure out. They live in a fungking town instead of on the lake. Can't they smell the smells?
"No, they can't and you know it." says Snoopy, trotting along with him.
Squirrels, chipmunks, Bing munches some frogs until they get wise and stay the fungk out of the puddles. Birds, man, the birds are awesome. Loons, those crazy fungkers, the noises they make. He whiffs a fox, but she's gone. oooooo. Not in heat though, dam. Why is there never a chick in heat up here? Fungk. There's a mink but she is cadgy. None of them get any where near her. Old ancient bear smells, dangerous as fungk.
They scent something new. "What the fungk is that?" says Bing.
"Dunno." says Snoopy. "I don't know. I don't like it. Let's be careful."
Jesus, old guys. Fungk careful. Bing is leading on the trail. He is going to catch this whatever the fungk it is. Oooo, man, does it smell. Hot and prickly. Oooo, but not that fungking skunk thing he and Snoopy found before. At that Big House where Snoopy mostly lives, with the old ones.
Oh, fungk, they're on top of it! Oh, fungk, he's a hunter, he's going to catch it, wait'll his family sees! He sees a glimpse, he charges, bites
FUUUUUNGK! HOT NAILS! FUNGK! He lets go! FUNGK!
It slaps him with its tail and fungk! The nails came off it! His mouth is full of nails! His fungking tongue is full of nails! He can't even talk!
Snoopy has a couple in his nose. Fungking nails. What the fungk was it? A nail gun? It was fungking covered with nails! It is waddling off! It isn't even hurt!
He tries to croak. "fungk, man," says Snoopy, whining. "Oh, my God. You are so fungked. Come on. Fungk, Bing, get up, we gotta get you to the people. You gotta get up man."
Bing gets up. He can't open his mouth. He can't close it. And fungk, it hurts. Some of the nails poke through his face and out his cheeks. He rubs a paw on his face and can't even fungking scream.
Yes, the people. He's gotta get to the people. Maybe they will help him with the nails. Oh, God, he hopes so. Otherwise he's well and truly fungked.