user since
Fri Sep 21 2007 at 18:49:58 (6.6 years ago )
last seen
Wed Feb 27 2008 at 22:13:18 (6.1 years ago )
number of write-ups
4 - View ReformedApostate's writeups (feed)
level / experience
0 (Initiate) / 76
mission drive within everything
To help!
specialties
Code, Theology, Music, Finance
school/company
Banctec.co.uk
motto
Just get on with it, man.
most recent writeup
al-Qaeda Policy Success
Send private message to ReformedApostate

I was a user. Actually, I was probably an abuser. I do not wish to be associated with who I was. Frankly, he was a prick. In case you wondered, I used to be K9.

Since people have asked, there is a reason for the new account. It's not that complicated. K9 would happily mock anyone, regardless of creed, colour, sexual orientation or religious affiliation. K9 was invincibly arrogant and secure in that he needed no labels for himself other than being himself but this brought a strong need to evangelize in the worst way - by attacking those he felt were "weak" enough to spread these tribal memes and perpetuate such damaging foolishness onward through yet another medium.

K9 felt very strongly that these things were dangerous and divisive props and crutches for those too scared to find their own way. He felt that those who needed them the most were harmful individuals; substituting faith and/or, to use his phrase, "ridiculous 1980's Identity Politics" for an actual personality. K9 knew in his soul that those who became the most angry over his relentless mockery; those who claimed offence to their self-imposed labels, they were people who who had trapped themselves in boxes and needed to be freed.

ReformedApostate does not believe that K9 was wrong, exactly. But I do believe that his methods were wrong and his arrogance blinded him to the pain he caused. I also believe that he began to gain in self-esteem by destroying that of others, and that led him to worse and worse excesses. I also believe that you can't free anyone by offending them. You cannot help by hurting. You cannot win by shouting. You cannot achieve anything worthwhile through fear, whether of mockery or anything else.

Penultimately, about my name. As a child, I was a gentle soul. I believed in everyone and trusted everyone. I had real faith; not in gods or fairies or miracles but in the essential goodness of people. In my teens, that reversed. I became the root of what K9 would be - I was apostate to my own faith and believed the worst of everyone, looked on the harsh side of everything, embraced cynicism and sarcasm and mockery as tools and weapons. I distrusted and despised all of humanity, starting with myself. I confess, I did try to make exceptions, but none of them could ever live up to the demands I placed upon them. I am now heading rapidly towards forty years old and am finally freed of some very old issues and complexes. Some things have been spoken of and reconciled that I thought never would be. It is time, I feel, to regain those childish things. The apostate is reformed.

Remember this; Even though we may disagree, I will do my best never to harm you in any way. I trust you. I believe in you. I love you.

And finally. My mission within E2 is to help. What I know best are technical matters and analysis of technical markets. To begin with, I shall add content regarding those things. Later, I may diversify. I don't know. I think it may be an awfully big adventure.