randomly went to a friend's steam page and took a look at their page comments. they were an old online contact. he must have been in his 20s when i logged on to greet him from time to time in my teens. 15? 16? it was all innocent, thankfully. we were friends. nothing out of the ordinary, quiet honestly. we played games, talked about life. he told me cautionary tales and i listened and wondered if he was an adult or a kid.
i check on his page from time to time, just out of habit. nostalgia. remorse? a tint of it, sometimes. mostly a yearning and desperate struggle to recall any memories of him. i hate that i don't remember his voice, but i'm grateful i encouraged and saw his art.
but i can't say that i was close to him. we barely spoke one on one. however i get closer every day to his age and i wonder what happened in his life to decide, yes, it's time for me to end it.
opened up his steam profile again. i saw a new comment on his profile.
last person to comment was a mutual friend of mine. i hadn't spoken to this friend in years. the last time i had most likely talked to him in earnest was all those years ago. someone i felt even more distant with. someone i don't think remembers my name back then.
he commented, only about a month and a half ago, saying "Still thinking about you"