An art. A sport. An excellent way to relieve tension.

You will need:

  • A few dozen small water balloons, prepared to be small enough to thow accurately with one hand.
  • A good tactical location above a Starbucks or other yuppie rendezvous point. The roof of any nearby building will do nicely.
  • At least one friend, suitably non-yuppie-like and wishing to relieve similar tension.

The procedure:

Wait for a yuppie to leave the coffee shop. Wait until it is well out of sight and earshot of the coffee shop, to avoid spoiling the element of surprise for further victims.

Say to your friend, loudly and clearly:

"Hey, I think I see a YUPPIE!"

Now throw one balloon each. It is not necessary to hit the yuppie directly, merely to frighten it. Morale attrition is the key.

Repeat as necessary. Avoid police at all costs -- and don't throw balloons at them.

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