A middle-aged minor league TV presenter, who hosts about 8 hours of .tv per day (and probably a big chunk of QVC as well). Best known for his very obviously chemically-assisted performances, in which even subjects as thrilling as USB hubs, memory cards and sub-notebooks are greeted with bursts of song, dancing, and pithy wisecracks usually at the expense of his co-hosts (such as "shut the fuck up".). This man smokes a lot of crack, maybe even more than the guy who does Newsroom South East. Also noted for his performance as a reputable spokesperson for Claims Direct, in a stunning minute long exploration into the depths of the ad-maker's art.

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