This is a translation of the 2 pages of 8 bit binary numbers from Douglas Coupland's Microserfs. It's a modified version of Gomer's speech from Full Metal Jacket when he's going nuts.

This is my computer
There are many like it,
but this one is mine.
My computer is my best friend.
It is my life.
I must master it, as I must master my life.
Without me, my computer is useless.
Without my computer, I am useless.
I must use my computer true.
I must compute faster than my enemy who is trying to kill me.
I must outcompute him before he outcomputes me.
I will.
Before God, I swear this creed.
My computer and myself are defenders of this country.
We are the masters of our enemy.
We are the savioury of my life.
So be it until there is no enemy,
but peace.


This is good to chant to yourself at those times when you hate your computer, or after exposure to TV or Hollywood films or any other noisy non-computer medium.

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