Ahh, banking melodrama... no life would be complete without some of this every once in a while. I just seem to attract more of this than the average person, I guess.

So, on Saturday I went to Electronics Boutique.. one of the places I have a notorious weakness for. It wasn't a matter of whether I was going to buy something or not.. it was simply a matter of choosing my purchase. You see, I had made sure I had enough money around between paychecks for such a purchase, and I couldn't wait to have a sparkly new Playstation game to play all weekend long. So anyways, I decided to get Vagrant Story, and I whip out my Fleet Check Card and slap it down on the counter, thinking that I have about a couple hundred in the bank, I'm all set for this.
"Declined." The cashier told me, with this blank look like I was the biggest idiot in the world or something. I stared blankly back at him. "Try it as Debit instead then.." I suggested. "Declined, again." he said.

It was at about this time that I figured out something fishy was going on. I told the clerk to hold on two seconds, and walked out into the mall, cell phone in hand, determined to figure out exactly what was going on. Faster than a speeding bullet, I dialed the 800 number for 24 hour service, punched in all the codes to check my balance. The bland computer voice said calmly, "Your current balance is minus eight hundred thirty-eight dollars and thirty-seven cents."

I stood in the middle of the mall in total shock. As people pushed past me, I came to my senses and pressed "0". I knew I hadn't screwed up this time, this was someone else's fault, but it was definitely my problem. After 10 minutes of Thrilling hold music, I finally got a hold of a human being. "Excuse me, ma'am, but I have what seems to be a problem with my account," I began. I eventually drew out of her that there was a transaction for more than $1000. I asked her, "So, where is this transaction from, and what's it for?"

She said simply, "I don't know."

At this point, I was thinking "Shit, well if you don't know, who does?" She suggested that it might just be because I was calling on a non-business day and that Monday they could fix everything.

So I sat on my hands for the rest of the weekend, with all of like $2 in my wallet and the spare change in my car to my name, patiently (well mostly..) waiting for Monday to roll around so that I could get this ugly mess straightened out. As soon as I got to work this morning and poured myself a cup of coffee, I picked up the phone and dialed away. This phone-monkey told me exactly the same thing. Except that, of course, they wouldn't be able to do anything until tomorrow.

"Great," I said, "Like that does me a whole hell of a lot of good. This is one of those times where I wished I kept my cash in a shoebox under my bed."

If only this were not a true story. I can't wait to wring someone's neck.

TheBooBooKitty just /msged me and asked what ended up happening. What I found out had happened was that my payroll check had bounced. Yeah. Because I had brought it to a branch, and it was a payroll check, the branch had cleared the check for the full amount and stuck it into my account right away. I paid rent, some bills, etc, and THEN they bounced my payroll check. The company I was working for was on its way under, evidently, although they were very good at hiding that until they started bouncing paychecks. Whee!

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