talking to G'd
a short exploration of Uri, post
Uri is alone. He is torn apart. He has burnt
homes and killed. Now he has finished, and rests,
alone, in a disused building.
URI: I can't believe you're G'd.
G'D: You want to see a miracle.
URI: That's not what I meant. Well, it is - but I
don't suppose you would.
G'D: Ask yourself why you suppose that.
URI: Well, because you don't really, do you? Not
G'D: Some would disagree.
URI: Well, are you going to?
G'D: I don't need to.
URI: So I was right then.
G'D: You have a question for me.
URI: Of course. I've got hundreds of questions
for G'd. All the "why"s and "wherefore"s ...
G'D: No. You only have one. You can't think of
any others because of it. It's eating you up, Uri.
It already singed your soul.
URI: Is that why you're here?
G'D: I'm here because I chose to be here.
URI: So perhaps I'll never understand what
brought you here, but I'm afraid to ask such a
G'D: If you don't ask me, I will never answer.
URI: But what if the answer is worse than the
G'D: Can any answer be more terrible than never
URI: I'm afraid of the truth. It might be my
G'D: Ask me what might be your fault, Uri.
URI: I can't. How can I ask? How can I ask you?
G'D: Would I command it of you, if you were not
URI: You might do this to destroy me. This might
be my punishment.
G'D: You assume too much. You have forgotten how
URI: How can I know what you will do? You are the
G'D: I am also commanding you to ask me.
URI: (pause) My whole family. Every one of them.
The shtetl. Dead. Alone. I saw their homes. Empty.
Falling apart. Was it my fault? Perhaps I shouldn't
have left. Perhaps it could have been different.
G'D: Nothing could have been different. You are
Uri. Uri does the things that Uri does. That is the
way you were created.
URI: Was it my fault?
G'D: You do not know what you mean by the
question. Many things happen that you can never
URI: Yes, but was it MY FAULT?
G'D: This question burns inside you. It will burn
URI: You've said that twice. WAS it my fault?
G'D: You must control the question. It is good to
ask questions. It is not good to destroy yourself.
URI: You won't answer me?
G'D: You have not asked the right question.
URI: So why did you make me ask?
G'D: So that you should know not to ask that.
URI: Should I have avenged them?
G'D: What do you think, Uri?
URI: I was so sure of it. I knew I should kill
them - for what they had done. To me. To us. To YOUR
people. Was I right?
G'D: What do you think NOW, Uri?
URI: Now I am unsure. I am afraid. Perhaps I did
wrong. Perhaps I should not have burnt their houses,
and destroyed their lives. Did it do good?
G'D: Your family are at peace.
URI: You didn't answer my question. Did it do
G'D: Your family are at peace. Did you think
vengeance could change anything?
URI: My G'd is a Jew. Every answer is a
question. I don't know the answer.
G'D: Did the deaths of your Lithuanians bring
light to my world, Uri? Defend your actions.
URI: It took away some of the darkness.
G'D: At the expense of some of your light.
URI: They deserved to die!
G'D: Nobody deserves to die. Some must. None
URI: Then they had to die!
G'D: Perhaps now you are closer to the truth.
URI: They would have kept on killing - if there
were any more of us left. They were proud of
what they had done!
G'D: There were no more Jews Uri.
URI: Then I don't understand. They had to die.
But there were no more Jews. Why did they have to
G'D: Because you had to kill them.
URI: And it guts me terribly. I alone must live
with this work of my hands. The passion has
consumed me. I am spent.
G'D: No man should have to kill. Your part was
necessary. You are not spent, Uri.
URI: I am tired, and now I wish to die. I have
done my part.
G'D: Your job is far from complete. There are
things that you must do, Uri. The killing is ended,
but you are not.
URI: Why? Why did it have to be like this?
G'D: You could never comprehend the answer.
URI: So there is an answer.
G'D: Of course there is an answer. Many answers
are simple. Not all answers are simple.
URI: That's a cop out.
G'D: You are in a battle, Uri. You have fought
in many. A general sends his men to fight. They will
never know who was intended to live and who was
intended to die. It was all planned. Some were
sacrifices. It was necessary - to win the war. The
general could not have chosen otherwise. Now I am
telling you, Uri, that you must survive. I am
commanding you survive. Forget why. It is not
important to you. Live, Uri. Breathe the air, and
rejoice that the air is there to breathe.
URI: What must I do, then? Where should I go?
G'D: Leave the land of your father, Uri, and
return to the land of your forefathers.
URI: I am not Abraham.
G'D: You are Uri.
URI: I was never a Zionist.
G'D: You will choose life. That is your
mitzvah, Uri. To survive. You will go. There is no
URI: Will I see Alex?
G'D: If you try. Do you want to see Alex?
URI: I wrote to him all the time. He's my friend.
G'D: Do you want to see him, Uri?
URI: I don't know. I'm afraid again. Did he find
G'D: Does it matter to you so much?
URI: Doesn't it matter to you?
G'D: He chose to live, Uri. That matters to me.
URI: She's not a Jew.
G'D: The beauty in her soul is not an accident
URI: So is she alive?
G'D: She is alive.
URI: Should I search for her?
G'D: Why would you do that?
URI: To bring her to Alex. Will I succeed?
G'D: Alex is waiting for you both in the land of
hope. Anything is possible in Eretz Yisroel.
URI: I am all alone. What will the future hold?
G'D: Now you have asked the correct question.
URI: Will you answer me?
written by Instantiator, not Jane Liddel-King (author of Davka) as an exploration of the character of Uri (who he played in the ADC performance of the show).