During a recent trip to Disneyland, my friend Sean dragged his wife and kids to see the "Great Moments With Mr. Lincoln" audio-animatronics show. His wife explained to the attendant that it was Sean's favorite attraction, so the attendant allowed Sean's two little boys to deliver the spiel welcoming people to the show and asking them to please keep clear of the automatic doors.

"WELCOME TO MISTER LINCOLN," the boys announced loudly. "STAND BACK FROM THE DOORS OR THEY MIGHT KILL YOU."

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