This is a humorous song based on Scripture and verse in the Good Book. I first heard this song two years ago on the Down and Connor Youth pilgrimage to Lourdes, as vocalised by the illustrious Fr. Gary Toman. It certainly made a change from On Eagle's wings and The Clouds Veil.

The Six Constipated Men

There were six, six, constipated men
In the Bible In the Bible!
In the Bible Hallelujah!
There were six, six, constipated men
In the B - I - B - L - E.

Now the first, first, constipated man,
Was Cain, he wasn't Abel.
Now the first, first, constipated man,
Was Cain he wasn't Abel.

There were six, six, constipated men
In the Bible In the Bible!
In the Bible Hallelujah!
There were six, six, constipated men
In the B - I - B - L - E.

Now the second, second, constipated man,
Was Moses, he took the tablets.
Now the second, second, constipated man,
Was Moses he took the tablets.

There were six, six, constipated men
In the Bible In the Bible!
In the Bible Hallelujah!
There were six, six, constipated men
In the B - I - B - L - E.

Now the third, third, constipated man,
Was Solomon, he sat for forty years.
Now the third, third, constipated man,
Was Solomon he sat for forty years.

There were six, six, constipated men
In the Bible In the Bible!
In the Bible Hallelujah!
There were six, six, constipated men
In the B - I - B - L - E.

Now the fourth, fourth, constipated man,
Was Samson, he brought the house down.
Now the fourth, fourth, constipated man,
Was Samson he brought the house down.

There were six, six, constipated men
In the Bible In the Bible!
In the Bible Hallelujah!
There were six, six, constipated men
In the B - I - B - L - E.

Now the fifth, fifth, constipated man,
Was Jethro, he couldn't shift his ass.
Now the fifth, fifth, constipated man,
Was Jethro he couldn't shift his ass.

There were six, six, constipated men
In the Bible In the Bible!
In the Bible Hallelujah!
There were six, six, constipated men
In the B - I - B - L - E.

Now the sixth, sixth, constipated man,
Was Titus - that explains itself.
Now the sixth, sixth, constipated man,
Was Titus that should explain itself.

There were six, six, constipated men
In the Bible In the Bible!
In the Bible Hallelujah!
There were six, six, constipated men
In the BEE AYE BEE ELL EEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Additional: There are a few extra verses floating around, such as 'Noah - he had an arkful' and other such gems. Feel free to add or subtract verses as you see fit - as a matter of fact, the song seems to have originally been about five constipated men, but like all good things has evolved over time.

Rock over London, rock on Chicago.

I was at the Renaissance Festival over the weekend and there were some 'nuns' there who sang a variant of this song, only in this specific case there were five constipated men (Cain, Moses, Samson, Noah, and Jethro, respectively) as well as a special bonus, one constipated woman. Instead of repeating the entire song, I'll just list the two new verses, plus the chorus, which is slightly different than the one in the above writeup.

There were five, five, constipated men
In the Bible,
In the Bible!
There were five, five, constipated men
In the holy books of Moses.

Now the fourth, fourth, constipated man
His name was Noah.
He nearly filled the ark.
Now the fourth, fourth, constipated man
His name was Noah.
He nearly filled the ark.

There was one, one, constipated woman
In the Bible,
In the Bible!
There was one, one, constipated woman
In the holy books of Moses.

Now the one, one, constipated woman
Her name was Eve.
She passed the apple.
Now the one, one, constipated woman
Her name was Eve.
She passed the apple.