in an absolutely revolting show of niche marketing, Palm released this thing which, I am sorry to say, is just a Palm Vx with an "Aqua metallic blue" shell, instead of the usual gunmetal grey.


Q: Does it come with Claudia Schiffer pr0n ?
A: No, besides greyscale pr0n at low res does not look so good anyway.
Q: Does it have Claudia Schiffer's voice as a system beep ?
A: No.
Q: What did Claudia Schiffer have to do with this thing which, I am sure, will be even more horribly expensive than the already-expensive Palm Vx ?
A: Well, she was photographed looking cute with it in her *very*own* hands. Also, "There is also a CD-ROM with software selected by Claudia including a complete guide to New York and London featuring cool stores, restaurants and hotels, image software that allows you to see photos on your Palm, a Claudia puzzle, diet software, and a fitness tracker", sez the site.
Q: Should I buy this thing ?
A: Hell, no. Not if you have more then two neurons and one axon. Get a Palm Vx, or maybe a Palm IIIc.
Q: But I really love Claudia, do you think that if I buy this she will love me too ?
A: But of course. While we are at it, would you also like to buy some stock in my Ruble/American steel industry/long-term peso stability investment fund ? Guaranteed to perform !

Dark predictions

Anodized aluminum can be made pretty much any color you want. Hence I must anticipate:
  1. Palm Vx Pope Edition, in solid white, comes with a map of Rome, a Latin grammar and an abridged index of the Vatican library. The glass is bulletproof.
  2. Palm Vx Al Gore Edition, in metallic envy-green, complete with 4 years countdown that appears at system powerup.
  3. Palm Vx De Beers Edition, metallic gold (affectionately known as PimPalm), with small solitaire diamonds in the 4 corners.
  4. Palm Vx Trip Nostalgia Edition, covered with hologram stickers, comes in a tie-dye pouch, complete with the Anarchist's Cookbook and Shulgin etexts.

I realized that many people took this for a joke. Well, it is not. If you take a look at (this look like a very un-permanent URL), you will see the beast itself.

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