Here's my biased view of white people. I am a person who lives in the Kindom of Thailand. I live in North Eastern Thailand, in a small town called Kumphawapi. There's nothing interesting up here, so the only white people I see come up here for special reasons that are not exactly honourable in my view.

The people I will refer to now on as Oaks, are basically loser white people. They come from all over the world. They have failed to make relationships in their own countries, thus they come to mine in search of ass. This is possible because my country is poor and Oaks are the opposite. Quite often these are men that would have probably given up life already, if they hadn't discovered this area of Thailand. They're divorcées, widows and lonely losers. They come here, find a woman and within a few weeks get married before their thirty-day visa expires.

Everyday I see these men walking around, talking on their phones most likely to their Thai wives, basically yelling to her. They yell at her because she can't understand his English. God for bid should he ever learn to speak Thai. Thai is one of the easiest languages on earth in my opinion. Seriously, for a good relationship to work, a common language should be spoken between the two. Hell even Issan is a very easy language to learn. How they ever agreed upon getting married is way beyond me.

At one point I used to make money off of Oaks. They would pay me money to be their personal assistant. Helping them set up bank accounts etc... Yet the worst job is to translate to their wives. Quite often the white man is quite open about his sexual activities; while this is sometimes okay in foreign nations, it is definitely out of the question here. I have been in the centre of hundreds of moronic fights. Plus, this job quite often would get in the way of school. Imagine getting a phone call in the middle of a class ... "My wife won't have sex with me, what's wrong?"

Here's the worst example to date ... one Saturday afternoon, I was out riding my bicycle, just around the local park. I get a phone call on my cell phone, a girl from my school, I hardly knew, invites me over to her house. I'm slightly confused as she sounds quite desperate for me to come and "help" her. As I ride up to her house, I see a Mercedes Benz parked in a tiny little lot for motorcycles, at a house that isn't quite deserving of a Mercedes. I walk in and find an Oak sitting at the table. My friend tells me that this is her father, but she can't understand him. So I ask the man his story... eighteen years ago he was divorced by his wife in Germany. He came to Thailand to find a new wife, and met my friend's mother. Got married, got her pregnant. Then his wife in Germany decided to reconcile, so he packed up and left without a trace. Now he's back because his wife in Germany is dead. Lovely story, isn't it? I lied to him and told him that his Thai wife died a year ago. I then told him to get out and leave Thailand forever.

Whenever I see an Oak on the street, I tend to avoid him and walk to the other side of the street. I hope they don't see me, and hope to god that they don't try to greet me. These men are beyond nasty. Sure I would like to speak some English to someone, but they aren't worth it.

There are some good white people that I have come in contact with. Ones that visit places such as Wat Ba Baan Taad, or ones that are staying the night on their way up to the Communist Republic of Lao, or ones that are on their way to visit Nong Khai.

The one reason why I hate Oaks is because I am judged as one, as I appear to look foreign. I attend school, and do normal things Thai kids my age do. I practice Buddhism along with the majority of Thai people. Yet whenever I leave the comforts of my small town and go out alone, people gossip along in Thai, thinking I don't understand a word. "He's really young, his wife must be ten", "Even foreign kids can buy Thai girls!" Imagine their embarrassment when I tell them "I'm only attached to my school work" in Thai.

Currently the Asian economy is on the rise. China will soon be one of the new superpowers of the world. Pretty soon America, Britain, France, Germany, Australia, and many others will be filled be facing the same problems only reversed. Imagine losing your girlfriend to some guy from Hong Kong.

The world is a crappy place, and it isn't getting any better. I officially declare Oaks - old rich white men with bad morals - a part of my Billybob's Axis of Evil.