Everything's Most Devoted Users

In light of paraclete's newest poll, I've culled from the database everything's most devoted users. Pretty simple criteria:

• Has signed in in 2006. Can't be too devoted if you're not around.
• 25 writeups. Don't worry, no one makes this list with less.
• A minimum merit of 5. See above.

So here's the list of the 200 most devoted users, and their devotion (rounded off.) As if anyone should be surprised, it contains a list of our oldest and best users.

rank	dev.	username
1	27238	Jet-Poop 
2	23682	Gritchka
3	23480	passport 
4	23037	aneurin 
5	22853	Lometa 
6	21201	The Custodian 
7	20733	Segnbora-t 
8	19861	borgo
9	18770	anthropod 
10	18195	TheDeadGuy 
11	16962	sekicho 
12	16192	Rancid_Pickle
13	16169	Gorgonzola 
14	16020	wertperch 
15	15466	ariels 
16	14909	Lucy-S 
17	14836	iceowl 
18	14368	m_turner 
19	14367	dannye 20	14286	SharQ 21	13922	WWWWolf 22	13814	mauler 
23	13421	Pseudo_Intellectual 24	13250	18thCandidate 25	12956	Quizro 26	12851	Footprints 27	12746	Jargon 
28	12613	mblase 29	12604	riverrun 30	12539	Tem42 
31	12386	Demeter 32	12230	fondue 33	12143	Lord Brawl 34	12098	Habakkuk 35	12075	sneff 36	11944	Saige 37	11930	Servo5678 38	11824	prole 39	11610	Glowing Fish 40	11250	enth 41	10983	kthejoker 42	10836	nine9 43	10663	Templeton 44	10530	TheLady 45	10489	hamster bong 46	9950	liveforever 47	9722	Noung 48	9574	Tlachtga 49	9281	ModernAngel 50	9256	sid 51	9157	Sylvar 52	8890	Orange Julius 53	8873	Ashley Pomeroy 54	8817	Ereneta 55	8792	baffo 56	8686	momomom 57	8561	Jack 58	8394	Transitional Man 59	8389	creases 60	8343	ideath 61	8168	Timeshredder 62	8156	StrawberryFrog 63	8108	legbagede 64	7981	kaytay 65	7958	haze 66	7833	izubachi 67	7691	jaybonci 68	7569	knifegirl 69	7438	mr100percent 70	7131	Jurph 71	7125	ophie 72	7013	JudyT 73	6981	Wuukiee 74	6916	gn0sis 75	6906	Roninspoon 76	6830	WolfDaddy 77	6820	etouffee 78	6778	BrooksMarlin 79	6755	wrinkly 80	6654	DejaMorgana 81	6626	Tiefling 82	6535	Mr. Hotel 83	6532	Apatrix 84	6528	Professor Pi 85	6422	xunker 86	6386	jessicapierce 87	6344	doyle 88	6298	allseeingeye 89	6190	RubenAzarja 90	6182	LaggedyAnne 91	6154	NightShadow 92	6101	ToasterLeavings 93	6033	Igloowhite 94	5970	bigmouth_strikes 95	5965	Mardy 96	5941	zgirll 97	5918	Chras4 98	5906	dem bones 99	5889	Oolong 100	5853	teleny 101	5817	Hatshepsut 102	5802	Jinmyo 103	5781	XWiz 104	5769	icicle 105	5744	NothingLasts4ever 106	5730	avalyn 107	5674	Palpz 108	5627	TAFKAH 109	5624	Scriblerus 110	5510	Albert Herring 111	5498	anyend 112	5432	drownzsurf 113	5417	skybluefusion 114	5340	amnesiac 115	5337	factgirl 116	5331	psydereal 117	5272	witchiepoo 118	5272	Heisenberg 119	5268	ryano 120	5254	in10se 121	5250	rootbeer277 122	5210	heyoka 123	5182	General Wesc 124	5172	Dreamvirus 125	5114	mkb 126	5055	Excalibre 127	5054	panamaus 128	5040	kto9 129	5037	QXZ 130	4989	qousqous 131	4936	Ouroboros 132	4903	O-Swirl 133	4897	bewilderbeast 134	4882	montecarlo 135	4837	Trina 136	4820	blaaf 137	4774	swankivy 138	4668	Bitriot 139	4648	longwinter 140	4635	RimRod 141	4634	Evil Catullus 142	4624	bol 143	4611	everyone 144	4606	IWhoSawTheFace 145	4591	liontamer 146	4590	Zach 147	4553	ccunning 148	4540	Walter 149	4522	dustfromamoth 150	4509	Teiresias 151	4465	cbustapeck 152	4433	smartalix 153	4428	artman2003 154	4425	sam512 155	4416	dutchess 156	4386	yclept 157	4362	fuzzy and blue 158	4351	mrichich 159	4347	GangstaFeelsGood 160	4288	Davidian 161	4276	drummergrrl 162	4272	moJoe 163	4255	nocodeforparanoia 164	4191	Anark 165	4179	Inyo 166	4170	yerricde 167	4160	stupot 
168	4144	Xamot 169	4084	Gone Jackal 170	4081	drinkypoo 171	4074	tandex 
172	4063	avjewe 173	4058	ac_hyper 174	4048	GrouchyOldMan 175	4024	wonko 176	4006	paraclete 177	3982	TallRoo 178	3966	Halspal 179	3949	etoile 180	3914	Devon 181	3910	Wiccanpiper 182	3900	C-Dawg 183	3848	oakling 184	3840	iamkaym 
185	3832	flamingweasel 186	3830	Orpheum 187	3795	girlotron 188	3787	Ikura 189	3779	spiregrain 190	3760	Scribe 191	3716	olmanrvr 192	3714	rp 193	3674	smileloki 194	3631	masukomi 195	3630	Amoeba Protozoa 196	3625	Posmella 197	3589	gahachino 
198	3576	Infinite Burn 199	3557	shmOOnkie pOOnks 200	3545	Metacognizant 

Jet-Poop's position is simply amazing. He is like Halspal + Lometa combined. Or Wiccanpiper, paraclete, Scribe, Biriot, avjewe, and DejaMorgana combined. Way to go, Scott!

I've devised a slightly new metric: addiction, which is devotion divided by the number of days the noder has been with E2. This is kinda fun, because you are constantly sinking, and can only maintain your position by constantly noding. Same criteria as above, here are the top 200:

(N.B.: Our dear friend TheBooBooKitty, known now as passport, has been excluded from this list. By moving his old account's writeups to his new account, his addiction is a whopping 63.2! Also, note that #1 and #2 also both benefit from being new accounts for older users, but they are at least reasonable enough (and still posting frequently enough) to keep on the list. Sorry, Paige.)

#	addiction	title	 1	15.92550 18thCandidate 2	15.38820 avalyn by day 3	13.14290 GentlemanJim 4	12.02350 aneurin 5	11.19720 Gritchka 6	10.35510 borgo 7	10.14470 sekicho 8	10.05830 Jet-Poop 9	9.41800	anthropod 10	9.13860	TheDeadGuy 11	9.01020	The Custodian 12	8.84750	Lometa 13	8.84150	iceowl 14	8.17380	Lucy-S 15	7.81080	SharQ 16	7.74660	wertperch 17	7.61480	shaogo 18	7.56020	Servo5678 19	7.55280	mauler 20	7.35330	Rancid_Pickle 21	7.17690	Tlachtga 22	6.93060	Gorgonzola 23	6.89030	Segnbora-t 24	6.86440	kthejoker 25	6.47170	paraclete 26	6.44300	m_turner 27	6.40410	ariels 28	6.39120	Timeshredder 29	6.17540	Jargon 30	6.03930	riverrun 31	5.87880	sneff 32	5.81630	Habakkuk 33	5.79080	dannye 34	5.74180	Jack 35	5.66070	Glowing Fish 36	5.61920	Footprints 37	5.56420	Demeter 38	5.52470	mblase 39	5.43980	psydereal 40	5.40090	enth 41	5.35260	WWWWolf 42	5.18250	Mardy 43	5.10480	Quizro 44	4.99400	Dimview 45	4.97220	prole 46	4.92150	haze 47	4.85040	Pseudo_Intellectual 48	4.82540	rootbeer277 49	4.78440	Junkill 50	4.76990	liveforever 51	4.72710	wrinkly 52	4.70330	Tem42 53	4.68940	Transitional Man 54	4.68120	Lord Brawl 55	4.61650	Ashley Pomeroy 56	4.50290	fondue 
57	4.50190	TheLady 58	4.48450	hapax 59	4.46450	doyle 60	4.44110	Templeton 61	4.42710	Noung 62	4.41720	Saige 63	4.35180	nine9 64	4.34870	hamster bong 65	4.31370	allseeingeye 66	4.24200	sid 67	4.21240	momomom 68	4.18190	bewilderbeast 69	4.07290	vivaldi 70	3.86720	artman2003 71	3.81640	BrooksMarlin 
72	3.75260	Orange Julius 73	3.73090	Major General Panic 74	3.72090	mr100percent 75	3.66030	baffo 76	3.64710	etouffee 77	3.58960	creases 78	3.55190	Danneeness 79	3.52890	ModernAngel 80	3.52050	kaytay 81	3.49120	gn0sis 82	3.46560	DejaMorgana 83	3.46350	legbagede 84	3.41700	eien_meru 85	3.41030	iamkaym 86	3.40870	Jurph 87	3.39010	ideath 88	3.36780	Sylvar 89	3.34340	LaggedyAnne 90	3.33160	in10se 91	3.32210	anyend 92	3.31980	avalyn 93	3.31490	izubachi 94	3.30760	montecarlo 95	3.29710	Heisenberg 96	3.29400	XWiz 97	3.27530	Hatshepsut 98	3.22730	Apatrix 99	3.19930	jaybonci 100	3.18090	RubenAzarja 101	3.17730	Ereneta 102	3.15780	Scriblerus 103	3.13200	Excalibre 104	3.09370	skybluefusion 105	3.08600	twofourtysix 106	3.05380	Wuukiee 107	3.02610	WolfDaddy 108	3.01360	smartalix 109	3.01030	yclept 110	3.00630	StrawberryFrog 111	2.99580	Palpz 112	2.99420	Bitriot 113	2.95250	Roninspoon 114	2.95120	Professor Pi 115	2.92260	Oolong 116	2.90110	Tiefling 117	2.89660	zgirll 118	2.87700	GrouchyOldMan 119	2.86090	benjya 120	2.85420	vwriter 121	2.83660	rummage 122	2.83510	drownzsurf 123	2.80240	NightShadow 124	2.79960	JudyT 125	2.79940	Chras4 126	2.77400	originalzin 127	2.75100	NothingLasts4ever 128	2.73450	knifegirl 129	2.73240	Wiccanpiper 130	2.70530	ac_hyper 131	2.70050	Igloowhite 132	2.69090	Dreamvirus 133	2.65570	bigmouth_strikes 134	2.61660	Scribe 135	2.61250	amnesiac 136	2.60770	Albert Herring 137	2.59790	IWhoSawTheFace 138	2.59530	kto9 139	2.58700	dutchess 140	2.58050	O-Swirl 141	2.56940	ophie 142	2.55490	ToasterLeavings 143	2.54490	liontamer 144	2.51710	sam512 145	2.49450	jessicapierce 146	2.47520	QXZ 147	2.47140	panamaus 148	2.42250	Jinmyo 149	2.41900	DylanDog 150	2.41430	xunker 151	2.40310	cbustapeck 152	2.36210	Walter 153	2.35370	icicle 154	2.34730	witchiepoo 155	2.31750	swankivy 156	2.30510	interrobang 157	2.29650	factgirl 158	2.29400	drinkypoo 159	2.29110	eliserh 160	2.28940	j3nny3lf 161	2.27910	qousqous 162	2.25990	dharbigt 163	2.24270	AudieMcCall 164	2.22460	heyoka 165	2.21680	mcd 166	2.21050	Ouroboros 167	2.20800	Davidian 168	2.20590	dustfromamoth 169	2.20110	Mr. Hotel 170	2.18650	Ikura 171	2.17400	smileloki 172	2.17390	Trina 173	2.17300	kobold 174	2.16530	kohlcass 175	2.16500	dem bones 176	2.12530	longwinter 177	2.10530	stupot 178	2.10220	fuzzy and blue 179	2.09210	Chase 180	2.08720	arieh 181	2.06690	Evil Catullus 182	2.05720	Dawggy 183	2.05250	Orpheum 184	2.05110	No Springs 185	2.04770	Teiresias 186	2.04760	GangstaFeelsGood 187	2.04510	bol 188	2.03470	gwenllian 189	2.01620	teleny 190	2.01360	oakling 191	2.00150	avjewe 192	1.98900	TAFKAH 193	1.98780	wordnerd 194	1.98620	Kizor 195	1.94370	General Wesc 196	1.93640	C-Dawg 197	1.93570	niruena 198	1.93220	Anark 199	1.91640	lovejoyman 200	1.91140	etoile 

One advantage to this is that it reduces the impact of merely having a lot of writeups, since that's mostly a function of time. Anyway, for your consideration.

Today I am driven like the snow to tell you about a growing problem in the Greater Baltimore Area and maybe elsewhere in the land of the free or supposedly free persons with constitutional rights denied for reasons related to what I am about to tell you about. Rightfully will you be horrified by this report but I assure you it is not doctored with details not present in the report as it happened to me yesterday a little before the time of day in which I write the report as you will read.

I met with my financial advisor, who took me out to a steak place with a full liquor license for lunch. Since I was on a break from my dual employment with the Greater Baltimore School System, between teaching a class in remedial science, which I am completely unqualified to teach, and my substitute gym teacher work, which I am less unqualified for but still unqualified generally for, I decided to follow Joe the financial advisor's lead and order an beverage from the bar. I chose a fine cognac suggested by the very attractive waitress along with a tall boy Miller Lite beer draught. We had steaks with sides of beans and/or peas along with baked potato and a cobbler dessert. We discussed my financial situation at length, made great headway and then walked out to the parking lot together.

It is important to note at this point that I have not had a car since an incident a couple years ago when my LeBaron, a Chrysler product, was taken for a joyride by two unkempt youths working valet parking for an upscale movie theatre where I was watching misleading communist fare. While I did not press charges, instead attempting to settle out of court (but then unable to find the youths in order to hammer out a bargain), I also did not realize that much damage had been done to my Chrysler product to an extent that Lee Iaccoca would have been rightly steamed. It has been in the shop for some time and frequently I have been given lame excuses by the mechanic and his henchmen about the status of my LeBaron, which I was unable to ascertain was actually still in the shop. I have two lesbian friends, who are both lesbians who work together in the offices of the company from which I draw my primary salary renumeration, Civil War Action Figures, Ltd., but they are not dating, never have dated and have not even done any fooling around other than playful bare boobie grabbing while we were all out on the town together. One of these uninvolved with each other lesbian friends of mine told me the place where my car is serviced is a chop shop and that my LeBaron is unlikely to still be there, despite claims to the opposite by questionable mechanic and henchmen associates.

Joe the financial advisor was driving me back to my employment with the Greater Baltimore School System and I was following him out the front door of the restaurant when a scowling lady coming through the door continued to scowl at Joe after he held the door for her and politely said unto her, "Enjoy your lunch." The scowling at Joe continued, despite his politeness in communication and door holding and I mentioned to him, "She could of at least said a thank you," as I found her behavior a befuddlement to societal actions generally accepted in such settings. She then turned around, walked back towards us and said, "I don't ever thank drunks, especially drunks who are about to get in a car and drive over innocent children who haven't had a goddamned chance to make anything of their lives yet before you rip those lives out from under them, asshole."

I was taken aback, as was Joe, who went on to tell her that he had only had a Scotch and water along with a large steak centralized lunch to balance the equation. He was cut off in his explanation and she did not respond in any way, as at that point a group of leather-clad vigilantes emerged from the parking area with wooden clubs and tennis rackets and closed around us in a threatening manner.

"Come with us, drunks, and get your comeuppance," the leader of this gang told us and then led us into the back of a broken-down pickup truck better served for bringing migrant illegal immigrant workers who deserve their own blood to be shed in honor of The Constitution to fields for manual labor. We were then driven out to a dirt parking lot way, way on the outskirts of what is the civilized metropolis of Baltimore.

We were taken out of the back of the truck and blows were delivered with wooden clubs and tennis rackets until I heard Joe the financial advisor's kneecap pop loose and rattle two to three inches down along the line of his shin bone where it remains to this day despite four operations performed by relatively competent doctors.

Yours truly, Berhardt Goats, was then pushed to the ground so the vigilantes could continue their vicious attack on Joe the financial advisor, who they at this point ascertained was the driver after pulling our keys out of our dress slacks and seeing mine contained only house keys, locker room keys and keys to the foreign body laboratory of the Greater Baltimore School System where various things I need for teaching remedial science are kept, including molecules and atoms.

And then they said unto me, "You aren't gonna give us any trouble, are you baldy?" And then went on to ask if I was a person of African American descent, using a term I cannot use here since it has been inadvisable to put this term in print due to other vigilante gangs of folks who have been active since two years after Ulysses S. Grant left office and had a song written about him by a band called Cream, which involved communist sympathizer Eric Clapton.

Once I explained I was not and that I was a middle aged man of Middle Eastern descent raised in postwar Germany, I was hit in the back of the head with a crowbar or similar such metallic device that makes a distinct ringing sound when it comes into contact with skull of human. Later that night Joe the financial advisor and yours truly, Berhardt Goats, woke up in very bad physical shape, tied to jersey barriers on I-95 outside of old Baltimore with barbed wire and crudely drawn signs fashioned of posterboard with words written on them with less than magical markers reading, "We drive around drunk all the time killing children."

This is the state of the nation.