Synopsis:
Although still a topic of much debate, Fetal Spontaneous Spurious Linkage Syndrome has been suggested as the definitive term for this phenomenon. When an expectant mother (sometimes even the father's activity is sufficient if proximal) continues to engage in that most insidious of addictive behaviours, noding, a child born with FSSLS is often the result. It has been hypothesized that such children will require careful management for at the very least the first two decades of life. Cognitive development is unlikely to follow the normal progression through Piaget's stages. Cognitive abnormalities are all too commonly exhibited.

Common Causes:
Maternal/paternal getting to know you noding, inappropriate intentional soft-linking, word salad rants, dream logging, verbatim transcriptions of resource material, poetry of variable toxicity, everything evolution suggestions.

Symptomology:
FSSLS infants often display disproportionate knowledge of particular subjects in which they have not been formally educated, while being unable to grasp the simplest of everyday concepts. Often, they respond to any and all external stimuli with the words "asian porn", and "getting to know you nodes fucking suck", which is obviously a source of great distress to the parents. They may form bizarre associations between experienced phenomena, such as attributing the existence of the sky to the presence of a chicken, since spam contains ham, which is from an animal, like a chicken, and spam cans can be blue. Usually, such associations involve a chicken, a monkey, or in very extreme cases, someone known as 'Mr. T' and his dietary habits. 'Nodebabies', when interacting with other infants, will often express extreme desire to 'vote' on the suitability and quality of their playmates.