The Mullet Patrol
is much like the Canadian Border Patrol
in that they're around, but they don't really do anything. Formed in 1997
as a result of the recurring
popularity of the mullet
at a local high school
, the Mullet Patrol started out with only two members
and grew to twelve
in its first year of serving the community
The MP did its job well that first year, seeking out and liberating an average (mullet-fu) of .2 mullets per month. As the MP learned well the best places for mullet hunting seem to be truckstops, laundromats, and anywhere you can find a Denny's.
Year 2: The mullet had gone back into hiding at the high school, but interstate shipping was bringing them in from all over the midwest. By staking out Denny's on a kids eat free Tuesday, one faction of the MP raised their mullet-fu by 3 points in under an hour.
After all potential mullets had been eliminated, the MP scaled down by streamlining or laying off half the MP Officers. Still, the Mullet Patrol keeps a small minuteman force ready to defend small town, America from the likes of bad hair. Mullets beware- the MP is alive and well. They will find you.