Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "Mom... Dad... I'm okay. I am not being starved, or beaten, or unnecessarily frightened"

• I keep thinking I'm so tough but I rarely care enough to prove it. So am I really tough then? Or does every dog just have its day?
• I'm not really okay with being hated for what I am. It's hard to take. But it's still better than being loved for something I'm not.
• at the moment i have forgotten if i am abraham lincoln or captain ahab - nonetheless i am an important figure in u.s. history
• You, standing
• Airport games that will get you arrested or beaten
• Slaughterhouse tour, or Why I'm no longer a lawyer
• I just submit to one or two days of horror for going out and playing at being a normal functioning person
• As I am. As I am. All or not at all.
• Am I insane, or is it just wishful thinking?
• Also, when I am angry, my eyes flash fire, whether I growl or not.
• Eduardo Kac's GFP Bunny, a work of transgenic art, or, It's not easy being green
• Am I a butterfly dreaming I am a person? Or a bowling ball dreaming I am a plate of sashimi?
• Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot!
• Am I or am I not a corporate slave?
• am i an angel flying into the light or a bug flying towards a light bulb?
• Am I in love or still on crack?
• The drunker I am, the better I am at pool. Or is that the other way around?
• I am attracted to gay men, famous actors, and men who live in different time zones or are already taken. It's safer that way.
• Am I the driver or the driven?
• Want to be shot in the US or beaten in the UK?
• I am afraid to breathe or shut my eyes but I do both.
• Am I This Or Not?
• Is this a cocoon or a tomb? Each comes with the risk of secretly being the other.
• There are more and better reasons to dislike a human being than race or religion
• Win99XSet, or 'Why my dad isn't using the computer'
• Are we listening, or are we just being silent?
• How I insulted a Mormon, or reason #78345 I'm an Idiot
• And if I don't die or worse I'm going to need a nap
• No one asks me if I'm a Satanist or anything because I take the precaution of wearing a predominantly flannel and hawaiian shirt-oriented wardrobe
• But I'm a good person! Yeah great you wanna help me with this or what?
• I'm beginning to think that nothing I think or say makes sense to anyone but me
• Some foods, I am convinced, are packaged only for families of 3 or more and bulimics
• Am I Hot or Not?
• I'm a nice guy...really, I am
• Dr. Bloodmoney or How We Got Along After the Bomb
• i am a human being. nothing human is alien to me.
• Correct me if I'm wrong, and if I am, I'll eat a bug
• 54-40 or fight!
• Am I hurting anyone if I'm rich?
• Be a model or just look like one
• Win, Lose, or Draw
• Red Mead, or Metheglin Wine
• When you're little, mom and dad are superheroes
• Dr. Strangelove, or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb
• Truth or Dare
• To be or not to be
• A Respectful Ode to a Person of Indeterminate or Irrelevant Gender
• Sew or Staple?
• paper or plastic
• Spit or swallow?
• Either/Or
• Opening champagne or sparkling wine
• island or lake?
• Pair or Single
• I am the only being whose doom...
• I'm tone-deaf, but it's okay
• Bobby Orr
• Bad command or file name
• and/or
• Do or do not, there is no try
• Give me Liberty or give me death
• Jesus did not say this; it represents the perspective of a later or different tradition
• Why some mammals have an aversion to water
• Void where prohibited or taxed
• Technological or Media Determinism
• Your Money or Your Life
• Smite heathens or have a beer?
• Reid-ing Hume, or Ex-hume-ing Reid
• Fun for 2 years as a little kid, school for 16 or 20 years, then work until you die.
• Made direct amends to such people wherever possible except when to do so would injure them or others
• The pros and cons of leaving your computer on
• Invalid HTML using "li" without "ol" or "ul" tags
• Why I think I'm a disgusting human being
• Tux ate my dad, my mom, and my sister too
• My Mom, My Dad, and the Red Polka-Dot Bikini
• I feel like I'm being watched
• I'm trying to see little old ladies as versions of my mom; it helps me be a better person
• My mom thinks I'm a satanist
• I'm going to be a Dad
• I'm Henry The Eighth I Am
• male or female
• Your place or mine?
• You must be 18 or older to enter
• Man... or Astro-man?
• Glen or Glenda
• Smurfette really wasn't a "smurf" nor an "ette"
• For Better or For Worse
• Do not bend, fold or mutilate
• -or
• Jan Ors
• Do we forgive our fathers in their time or in our time?
• or
• Is language innate or learned?
• Take it or leave it
• more or less
• Every school is either a Pepsi school or a Coke school
• St. John's or St. John?
• Which came first: the chicken or the egg?
• Here's what I hope to do with the Everything code or with something like it
• Windows 95/98 - an OS or a virus
• Teach Yourself Scheme: 4.4 'and' and 'or'
• Broiled Blackened Chicken or Fish
• Invalid HTML using "h1" in "ol" or "ul" tags
• shift left (or right) logical
• Bikini or thong?
• sooner or later
• Squid or Sailor?
• 'Fuck off' used as a replacement for 'good', or 'very'
• Live Free Or Die!
• Working hard, or hardly working?
• To Stir or Not to Stir
• Ripley's Believe it or Not!
• believe it or not
• The answer is usually "Fine," whether or not you are fine
• You can't predict or control what incidents in your life your friends will remember and retell
• Shaving your nuts without permanent injury and/or accidental castration
• Abused or neglected children
• Are you in the light or in the dark?
• I'm not a monster, Tom. Well, technically I am. I guess I am.
• I often wonder if I am closer to reality simply for being poorer
• being beaten into an unhealthy state by other people's pasts
• I'm being eaten by a boa constrictor
• I'm ceded--I've stopped being Theirs
• A sexist joke I'm allowed to tell, due to being a woman
• The drum of death is being beaten.
• "Mum, Dad, I've packed my bags and I'm moving out. I'm staying at Everything2."
• My mom has the Pope, my dad has my mom, and I have the sky
• A Letter from Mom and Dad
• Aw, Mom, ya know I'm not like other guys; I'm nervous and my socks are too loose
• Hi, mom; I'm gay
• My mom is my dad is my daughter is dead
• Being a dickhead
• I'm not PMS-ing, I am just hormonally imbalanced
• Exclusive Or
• Dead or Alive
• Skate or Die
• Sweet Thames, run softly, for I speak not loud or long
• I'm no better off with a car than I am without one
• Portland, Oregon
• Subtitled or Dubbed?
• Our way or the highway
• Red or Blue Pill
• I don't even know when I am being sarcastic anymore
• My country, right or wrong!
• If I am doomed to sweat my ass off in my own apartment, I feel better if I'm blasting music
• Queen or country?
• Trick or treat
• Jesus undoubtedly said this or something very like it
• Heaven or Las Vegas
• Shut Up or Stand Up - The Brag
• Abort, Retry, or Fail?
• Lila or a Lie
• Dental surgery, or, how I learned to appreciate anesthesia

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