After I heavy night of drinking
yesterday, and not being able to sleep, I sat in front of my laptop, and below are the edited highlights of my drunken ramblings.
James shifted, deep in sleep, trying to find a comfortable niche in his inflatable cushion.
Irritably nearing consciousness, James tried to bury himself deeper into his sleeping bag.
FOR JACOB’S SAKE! AWAKEN LUKE! I DO NOT HAVE TO TIME TO STAND IDLE BY YOUR BEDSIDE!
Streaming white light and a noise like a deafening explosion brought James forcefully awake. Casting around, he saw a man, standing a few feet from him. Rubbing the sleep from his eyes, the first thing that James noticed was the fact the man seemed to have no issue with gravity, standing (or hovering, he corrected himself) over the edge of the cliff, where he had made his camp for the night.
He also seemed slightly insubstantial, flicking slightly, as if he wasn't all there.....
At last. You are awake. More there is much to tell you….
James, now thoroughly confused, glanced around to see if he was addressing anyone else. Not a sole was in view, with the exception of a particularly hungry sheep, which was blithely ignoring all activity and was engrossed with a particularly stubborn blade of grass.
Yes you, moron. Now come, let us walk
And with that, the man wheeled around, and began to walk further out over the cliff.
Luke, now is not the time to be petty. Just step out behind me.
Christ, I know it’s been a while but walking should not be an issue for a mage of your abilities.
Tentatively, James moved over to the edge, and was about to step out over to drop, when he stopped.
“Look, I’m not moving any further until you explain to me what the hell is going on!”
Sighing, the man turned back towards James and returned to the cliff face.
Well, you have changed Luke. Do you not recognise your father? Or have you, as they say, turned native. Your adoptive parents never mentioned me?
“Adoptive parents? Are you sure there hasn’t been some mistake?”
Mistake? I, the great Al-dorn, do not make mistakes! You are Luke Arehretyu, born in 17843 of the Fourth Age to the Lord and Lady of Gladgutrbi, may their souls rest in peace. Did your adoptive parents tell you nothing? Nothing of the fall of Kutryn and the Free World? Nothing of how you where transported here as the sole hope for our kind.
“Look, my name is not Luke. I am James Smith, born in 1978 in Bradford. I have no idea who or what you are talking about, and another thing….”
James tirade was interrupted by a small and weedy voice behind him. He wheeled around to confront the newcomer and was surprised to see a small child, no more than 10, behind him, teddy bear in hand.
“It appears that a mistake has been made. For I am Luke, and I believe you have come for me, not him”
The man looked the boy up and down, gave James a look of exasperation, and sighed to himself.
You? You are the saviour of our entire nation ? You, a mere child, are supposed to stand up to the evil lord Kalporth and smite him unto the ground in masculine fury, as foretold by the Oracles? YOU?
Are you sure you aren’t him? 100% sure?
He said, looking once more, imploringly at James
In that case we must go. It appears we have more to do than I thought. Including finding some of those growth hormones these humans are so fond of.
And with a pop, both of them disappeared, leaving James and the sheep alone on the hillside.
Defiantly the ration packs” James muttered to himself. “I thought the sale-by date has wrong”