I am infinately capable of producing a facade of self-assuredness. It is very likely why people come to me to help them with problems, often BIG problems. The women that I know that have been raped often ask me what they should do. The women at the shelter I volunteered at a few years ago often asked me where they should go from there? Children of divorces want to know what's going to happen to them next?

I don't know the answers to these questions.

Because of that, I've become a wealth of resources. I may not be able to tell a woman who was raped four years ago what she needs to do to go through her own healing process, but I can put her in touch with twenty organizations that may be able to. I may not know what a woman running from an abusive husband should do now, but I can get her the numbers of people who can help her find a place to live, clothes for her and her children, and legal services to obtain a divorce and restraining order.

I've always felt the weak link in this chain. Like it was a cop-out to be giving out phone numbers instead of advice.

I've been searching for my own strength for a very long time.

I have tried everything: counseling, self-affirmations, education, community service ... I've even tried mantras and religion. And I have found nothing.

This weekend, I realized what nobody could tell me, because I needed to discover it myself:

My strength is already in me

I do not need anybody to save me. I do not need the ideas and words and actions of other people, because I was born with all of the strength I ever needed to have.

I also realized that I am not a weak link - I am a powerful woman with powerful thoughts and connections.

I am my strength.

I never knew finding it would be this easy or feel this good.

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