I was one of two pizza delivery D00dZ a la Bio-Dome, and though our employer wasnt normal either, he was rather displeased with our work. When he wanted to see us outside his working hours, we headed to a small shed next to his pizzeria, and there were just two rusty barrels inside. We got down into one barrel and down the secret ladder into a large underground cave with an underground river, run-down house of our employer, and a blue throughoutly rusty Datsun leaning against the house. Our employer told us we were suspended, but we didnt take that too hard and just got back up the other ladder to the surface. Now that we didnt have a job, we had to get money someway else, so we decided to go to the mall that had expensive living quarters in it and steal something from the place we had gotten stuff from before. When we got inside, we headed up a ramp to the second floor, climbed on a glass box with advertisements inside it, and got into an airvent. It had been some time since we last got into this apartment, but I still remembered it well enough so we found our way in trough the airvent of the hall inside.

I remembered the last time we had been there, so I knew there was a motion detector behind the corner, but I didnt know that they had installed new motion detectors too, untill I ended up facing one in the hall. The red light on it hadnt yet flashed, so I tried to stay as still as possible, but it soon blinked anyway and I told my friend to get back into the vent. I didnt have time to get in before I heard the rattle of keys by the door, so I just leaped on the floor behind a sofa. I heard talking of the persons who got in, and as one of them was about to come around the sofa to see what had opened the vent, I slided under the table, which was a very bad cover because of its light structure. I still tried to stay still, untill Tarja Halonen noticed me and happily told me to get up. I dont know if she pretended to his quests that I belonged there, or tried to get me ashamed, but I did as she told and greeted all the other diplomats. The presence of Osama Bin Laden made me wonder a bit, but then I noticed that he was the human who was standing on the airplane in the introduction of Inherit The Earth.

I dont remember the details for a while, but at some point I was alone with two diplomats, and it turned out that they were aliens. As I knew what they were, they tried to intimidate me, but I managed to beat them up, scaring the two kittens of Tarja Halonen in the progress. I didnt want kittens to suffer, so as the aliens started retreating, I took the kittens out from under the sofa and petted them untill they calmed down again and started to purr. I put the kittens on the sofa and said the quote from Duke Nukem 3D to the aliens, "How many more alien races come here to get their asses kicked? I quess one more..." and left the apartment.

I had never used the door of this apartment yet, but I somehow managed to find my way down to the mall. As I got down to the first floor, I noticed that security personnel were checking in, most likely because of me, so I turned around and headed into the storage area of the stores. The security noticed me and came after me, so I started running, carefully because the floor of the cold room was icy, and tipped over a pile of cardboard boxes to obstruct the way of the security personnel. That bought me some time, but they were still after me so I used a teargas grenade I had gotten at some point and dropped it on the floor. As it exploded, I just managed to get out from the outer door before the gas reached me, leaving the security slipping over inside. The pizzeria was near, so I quickly used the secret entrance in the shed, found my friend there, and hid there untill the dream ended..

Last night I was nearly killed by an everythingian.

Enth and I were hanging out at his place, which evidently is the same apartment with the same furniture and in the same location as the apartment that I share with Kimonade. Funny how that happens. We were chilling, he wanted me to wait for his girlfriend to come over, she had been out of town apparently and was due back in that night. Finally it was like four in the morning, and she still hadn't shown up, I was like, "Dude, I'm sorry but I need to leave and get some sleep tonight, I don't think she's coming back tonight, it's too late."

enth: "That's okay, she actually isn't supposed to come back tonight."
psy: "Then what's going on?"
enth: "I invited you over because I wanted to kill you."

With that he pulls out this huge, silver knife that glistened in the light like it would have in a horror movie. I freak out, jump off the couch, grab my cell phone and run out the door. He has our candle torch, he's pointing it at me like a gun and pressing the trigger, but it isn't doing anything.

So I'm running up the hill (why would I choose to run up that damn thing, I have to walk up it every day for classes and it's not a fun hill!) and I start to dial 911, but I make a mistake and dial 611 instead, so I hang up and dial it right. "911, what's your emergency?" "My friend, he's trying to kill me." "Can you get out of the house?" "I'm running up 11th street right now."

I look behind me and enth is running after me, twice as fast as me, looking like that deranged basketball player from the original Buffy the Vampire Slayer movie. I mean, boy was deranged, and grinning like a madman, seeming to float up the hill like a ghost with knife pointed at me that reflected the streetlights.

I flipped and just sceamed HE'S GOING TO KILL ME!...I did in real life as well, so I woke myself up from the first nightmare I've had since I was a kid.

So, who would prevail in a showdown between enth and psydereal? We may never know...

Geographically Impossibile

Up in the Santa Cruz Mountains, west of Highway 17, inland of the summit, I've found a rocky cliff overlooking a waterfall. There's a fence around the edge, which of course makes me think about jumping in. The view over the edge is vertigo-inducing: a drop of hundreds of feet, whirlpools, the strangely silent waterfall. Looking farther out, I see that all this is fed by the ocean. (Never mind the mountain range that should be in the way, or the fact that oceans don't have waterfalls.) Crowning it all is the most beautiful sunset I have ever seen, shimmering like ethereal abalone shells, through clouds reminiscent of the Kingdom of Zeal.

I make to leave, and the vertigo kicks in. How did I get here? Does it have anything to do with the playground I dreamed was near here years ago? (And since when do I have a geographic memory? Maybe it was something I ate?) And since when is the rock I'm standing on not connected to the main land mass?

I start to jump back to the mainland, and notice my laptop is here. I must have brought it with me, but it may have spontaneously appeared, as if to warn me of the danger posed by the water. Of course I don't make the jump. I try to at least get the computer to dry land, but everything is too steep. It gets wet. I make for the ladder.

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