I hate Daylight Saving Time. I always end up confused and late for everything. I blame Ronald Reagan for making life so difficult. That's just like the republicans, changing the whole country's clocks just to accommodate the farmers. Arizona has the right idea: stick it to the man! I suppose that may be because Arizona has no farmers. I wonder if that's because Arizona can't grow anything in its soil. Anything but cactus, anyway. Aren't there any cactus farmers? I suppose a cactus farmer wouldn't have to get up early to water the crops anyway; cactus are all right if you forget to water them every once in a while. Maybe I'll be the first cactus farmer. Boy, that'd be sweet. I could sleep in and not ever have to change my clock. And it'd be all good if I forgot to water the crops. I bet harvest would suck, though, what with all the needles. I bet a real Arizona cactus farmer would have some kind of machine to take care of the dirty work. So I could sleep in and never change my clock, while the machine harvests the cacti. Well, if not a machine then cheap illegal immigrant labor. Damned republicans think they know what's best for me. Well no sir! Nobody can stop me from fulfilling my dream of being the first Arizona cactus farmer, sleeping in, forgetting to water the crops, and never changing my clock.

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