Before screenings at the (now, sadly, defunct) [UC Theatre] in [berkeley, california|Berkeley], the management would play a [thank you for not smoking] [public service announcement]. A little less than half the time, they ran a [cartoon] of a [cigarette] and an [ashtray] [flying through space] [on a collision course]. But the favorite of the house was this [PSA] from [John Waters]:

(Mr. Waters, dressed in a very '70s wide-collared yellow shirt, stands center,
in front of a blank wall.)

Hi, I'm [John Waters], and I'm here to tell you that there's [no smoking] allowed in this theater.
Which I just think is [one of the most ridiculous things I've ever heard in my life].
I mean, who can sit through the length of a [film],
especially a [foriegn film|European film],
and not have a [cigarette]?
[But don't you wish you had one right now?]
So, smoke anyway,
it gives [usher]s [employment|job]s, and,
[without smoking, there would be no employment for the youth of today].
So, [please], once again,
[no smoking] in this theatre..
(Mr. Waters takes an exaggerated, almost grandiose [French inhale] from his cigarette,
and gives a [truly satisfied|satisfied] and [evil|spiteful] smile.)

Distribution of this reel was limited to the [Landmark Theaters] art-house cinema chain, for whom [John Waters] improvised as a show of appreciation, "I was thanking the [Nuart] for buying my cigarettes, paying my [rent], and then they had 50 feet of film and they just said, '[Do anything],' and I just made it up, one take, a complete fluke. ...It turned into this [militant smoker] thing, which I was. I used to purposely light up on elevators. I smoked swimming. [I smoked in the middle of the night]. I set the bed on fire all of the time. ... I coughed so much that on the street, strangers would come up to me and say, '[Are you all right?]' ... If I could've shot 'em, I would've."

This trailer was included on the [the criterion collection|Criterion] Laserdisc release of [Polyester].

[AudieMcCall] says I remember seeing this back in '85 at the [Charles Theatre] in [Baltimore, Maryland|Baltimore].
[ouroboros|I] could not have goten into a John Waters film in '85.

John Waters' thank you for not smoking PSA