being a
with License

There has been a long and glorious history to the esteemed tradition of being a dick. Nero was a dick to the christians, Caesar was a dick to the germanic tribes and Cher was a dick to Sonny. It is a long story of people being jerks, ass wipes and assholes-in-general. This is really old news in this day and age with legendary dicks like Putin and Bush (senior), but only recently has the phenomenon of being a dick with license been improved.

The process of Dickage with License (DwL) takes the regular methods of being short, curt and unreasonable one step further toward the ultimate goal of total second-party alienation. While being a dick will achieve this given time, the benefit of DwL is that you achieve this end without the tedious end of admitting you are a actually doing it. This is a beautiful design because it will allow you to be as unfairly unpleasant as you like while leaving the party no other recourse to respond. This is the "license" part: to make the abuse completely one sided so an argument can be as absurd as you like -- in fact, the more obtuse the abuse the better.

There are three ways to achieve this successfully. The first way is to end the abuse after the initial assault has been made wither by walking away or preferably by not allowing the other party to talk afterward. The second is the most difficult which is to constantly deride, in any way, the rebuttals being made -- these responses should be as harsh and painful as possible. However, the third and most rewarding way is to be in a position of power to where the party receiving your abuses cannot respond for fear of unrelated retaliation (e.g. physical harm, kick/ban etc); this is the the mode to be aspired to because it makes you appear to be in a position of almost messianic power.

Remember, abuse of power and position is the greatest thing you can attain in your short, empty and pointless existence.