Track 11 on Choking Victim's album No Gods / No Managers (Hellcat, 1999). A lively ska tune about the excitement and morality of shoplifting. This is one of the brighter songs on the album, lyrically and melodically, but it fits in well with CV's usual subject matter which is generally the denunciation of government, society and in this case capitalism.


A walk through the product store and 15 aisles to see
All the pretty, pretty packages staring back at me
Which is my favorite, where is my chance
To remove the product, and stick it down my pants

'Cuz I wanna see, what's on sale? what's for free?
Every time I go to shop I steal from enemies
Who steal from me, and from you
If you only knew, then you would steal too!

Adrenaline rushes, the product's in my grip
I am only shopping, but now it's time to lift
I look for my moment, and down my pants I stick
The product I've selected is concealed against my dick


Paranoid as fuck, security in tow
Is he really trailing me and does he really know?
Of my little secret: my pride and his shame
This is so exciting, it's like a fuckin' game
I'm almost to the counter, will I make it do the door?
Will I get away like a million times before?
Or will I be caught, jailed, banned from the store?
Like if the product I've selected slips and crashes to the floor



I get to the door and out the door I slide
I feel a sense of dignity, I feel a sense of pride
I do a happy dance and down the street I bail
As I have a little feast of what's on sale!

See my No Gods / No Managers write-up for these five-finger discounters' opinions on copyright.