Just received a call from a potential future.

This call on my mobile at the end of another brain-rotting day of spiralling boredom feeding procrastination to guilt had a chinese accent. He wanted to talk to me about my recent application to go back to university. I graduated from there, what.. 4 years ago? I was a different person then. I have since changed and I fear going back, as if it would set the clock back to a time when I was more naive, more uncertain, more scared. I worry about wastefully repeating a chapter in my life. Then I realise that I am already wastefully repeating every working day.

I want to go back. It will be a new experience because it's defined by my attitude to it. It's what I'm excited about and it's at least closer to where I ought to be.

It will be a challenge. That's a good thing. I have become way to cosy and closetted of late. I need the opportunity to grow again.