There is a special feeling when you make a major purchase. For a geek like me, it happens when I get a new computer.

It starts with the decision to make the purchase and you do the research to pick out that perfect system. There are so many factors to consider: price, minimum acceptable performance, platform and most importantly colour. Then you have to find a dealer that has the model you want. A quick click of the mouse and before you know it, your credit card is melting from the experience.

Then the fun starts. You wait 1 week, 2 weeks, 3 weeks and finally you get a phone call from the courier that it is in their warehouse and will be delivered the next day. But, you can't wait so you ask where the depot is and tell them you'll pick it up today.

The waiting process is kind of strange. You're restless at night and apprehensive during the day. You have a nervous excitement about getting it but you're not sure what you're going to do with it once it arrives. Nor, are you sure what it is exactly capable of doing. You just have a vague feeling that you must have it.

Then it arrives and you have an explosion in your head and heart. Your fingers can't type fast enough nor can you move the mouse with a jolt of electricity surging through your hand. First, the Internet must be connected so you run some new CAT5 and configure the TCP/IP. Then you start downloading your favorite programs, install an editor/compiler and write a "Hello, World!" program.

Benchmarks! You got to do benchmarks. If it were a car, you'd find a straight stretch of road and see how fast it would go. Having a computer is no different. It's primal. You just got to know.

You reach a point of exhaustion. You finally have all the software load, the desktop is laid out the way you want and you've thoroughly tested every aspect of the system. It's a Zen moment. You just sit there, some times for days, simply admiring it. It is a thing of beauty. It has been assimilated into your life and lifestyle. You are one with the computer and you swear that you will be faithful to it and only it.

Strange, as I look around the room, I see a dozen discarded computers: each and every one, the same feeling, the same moment. Like pearls on a string locked in the vault of memory. This is my life. I am a geek.