Is because the vast majority of American television audiences think like this:
Date: 24 July 2004
Summary: The worst show of all time next to The O.C.
The 2002-2003 television season featured tons of unwatchable shows, more unwatchable shows than any other recent television season. Out of all of the unwatchable shows put out that season, this was the worst one. Then again, it was created by the guy that gave us “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” so of coarse it was going to suck. I considered this the worst show of all time until The O.C. came on the air last summer. Maybe this show would have been watchable if the acting and special effects weren’t so unbelievably bad. Yet despite the atrocious special effects and acting, the show somehow developed legions of fans and found its way onto DVD. Now a FIREFLY movie is being made. It will no doubt be the worst movie ever made, even worse than YOU GOT SERVED.
I’m so pissed off about this show being cancelled, no doubt because of COMPLETE AND UTTER FUCKLEAVINGS LIKE THIS, that I’m going to wait to write my review on IMDB. And it will be glowing. This show is the best science fiction I have seen on television, ever.
God damnit I am angrier about this than I should be.
But seriously WHAT THE FUCK. “Bad special effects”?! No, this was no Lord of the Rings, but it’s made by fucking Fox. Were you mad at the lack of fwoosh and zoom in the space scenes? How about that there were no firey explosions in the vacuum, or any sound during scenes set in vacuums at all? Or that there were more bullets than lasers? Or that there was no peaceful space-exploring utopia with snazzy uniforms and morally infallible characters? Or that there was no super spooky, pseudoscientific, metaphysical bullshit beyond what was immediately required by the concept of a ‘supernormal brain’? I AM SORRY, AM I OFFENDING YOU? OFFENDING YOU WITH SCIENCE? OFFENDING YOU WITH REASON?
Lucas and Roddenberry have both saved and ruined science fiction. Yes, it’s almost entirely due to their creations that we even have any pop culture sci-fi media, but their laser-blasting, noisy space-dogfights in AERODYNAMIC SPACESHIPS have made expectations for ‘science fiction,’ as a genre, completely fucking skewed. The average person hears “sci-fi” and thinks “Star Wars.” I fucking love Star Wars (with the exception of the newest movies). But I love it for what it is: Space Opera. Science is not involved in any way, not even the fictional way. And Star Trek can kick ass, but damn it. It’s got more logic holes in its little fictiverse than I care to address, because it’s already been addressed countless times and there’s no way people would watch it if it weren’t mostly gibberish. Galaxy Quest established this, soundly.
In closing: Google your username, “jellyneckr,” you ignorant, tasteless little peasant. You’ll find this entry, because Google loves my Livejournal like a fat kid loves cake, and I want you to see my rage. And if you comment, you can bet your ass I’ll ban the shit out of you. DO NOT PASS GO. DO NOT COLLECT 200 COMMENTS. GO DIRECTLY TO JAIL, WHERE A VERY LARGE MAN IS GOING TO MAKE YOU HIS CAMWHORE.
I’m a mature individual in this respect.