One of the best days I've had this year, so far, and probably going to remain that way for a long time. I had the most improbable but, rewarding, event happen to me.

My ex-girlfriend, whom I broke up with almost a year ago (sometime during spring 2001), contacted me via IRC, on the very same day that I had had an ADSL box installed at my apartment and, at such late time I was just preparing to hit the sack for a good night's sleep.

I was stunned; I didn't know how to react since our separation had been like a thunderstorm of the century, volcano eruption, earthquake and a tsunami combined. Rather unpleasant and rough, one might say. I did reply to her, though, since I was curious to hear what she had to say.

Not only was this a good thing to do, it was the best thing I could've done.

The conversation started at a rather formal level, asking all the "how have you been? how are you doing now?" etc. questions. Then it got deeper and way more personal - We ended up going through all the bad things that happened towards the end of our relationship, all the hurt, all the naive words and deeds and actions we said and did to each other. Practically, everything we had left unfinished or didn't, at the time, know how to rationally deal with.

Needless to say but, I was crying my eyes out along the way. Not because I would miss the relationship so much or, because I would still be hurt and angry at her but, because all the feelings I had suffocated and buried deep down in my heart, in an attempt to deny and forget, surfaced. What made all the difference was that I finally got the chance to apologize to her for all the hurt I had caused and, realized she too was truly sorry about the bad things she had said and done.

The times when I've felt as relieved as I did after that conversation can be counted with the fingers of a single hand. It was ... I simply lack words for how critically important that particular two-hour conversation was for me and, undoubtedly, to her as well. Finally I'm not afraid to hear about her from our mutual friends. Finally I'm not afraid of running into her somewhere and getting into the awkward situation of not knowing what to say or how to react to her presence. Finally I don't feel like hearing her dating someone else would shatter my world (I know that might sound stupid since I'm already dating someone else myself but, there was so much we needed to discuss, so much hate and regret to be processed and forgiven, so much unnecessary stress and mental burden neither of us needed nor deserved to carry).

I feel redeemed, relieved, and at last there is a real chance we can become the good friends that we couldn't be during most of our relationship as a dating couple.