I remeber thinking that after I got out of high school, life would be simplier. There wouldn't be the fucked up history with everyone I saw. Nobody would have all of these preconcieved notions about me (some justified, some not). I just thought that starting all over would make life easier.

I was wrong.

College is no less complicated than high school. My life is actually harder to navigate through, now that I have the issues with people from high schools, problems and complex relationships with people from college, and then all of the crap and people that don't fit into any catagory. Not to mention my relationship with my parents. While I will admit fully that it has gotten 200% better (and it was never really bad), it has gotten strange. My dad will now sit down with me and discuss his old drug exploits. My mom actually says "fuck" in front of me without blushing.

Life didn't get simplier - it got stranger.

This always becomes more obvious when I'm home for a visit. Every time I return to Montana, I get a minor panic attack.

I'm just no longer used to running into people that I thought had ceased to exist after high school. I'm not used to people that I didn't even know recognizing me, running up to me, and giving me a hug.

My life is weird everywhere ... but it's really obviously strange here.