with smeared lipstick and my heart on my sleeve
Alright, I'm feeling pretty good nowadays. Not exactly self-actualized, because that's not easy to do right now, but I'm feeling unpressured and awash with semi-contentment on this night. So it's time to get some things out there and maybe say something of meaning. Here goes.
The other day I was talking to Eric and he had to go so I said, "later alligator," to which he replied, "after a while, crocodile." Two nights ago I was driving home from work at a quarter past nine. The sun was long gone but the light radiating off the street made it impossible to see any stars. The night sky was a perfectly black backdrop for the silhouetted trees. Today one lady thug smeared fire red lipstick on my blue shirt sleeve because she had made a mess of lipstick on her hands and all I had to offer was said shirt sleeve.
Do you realize how amazing these moments are? And everything in between? I do. Sometimes it really frightens me - all the things going on, the intricacies of a million events leading up to one sliver of time. I wonder what I might be missing, and I try all the time with everything I've got to feel the astounding beauty of right now. It's overwhelming and I love it. Sometimes I can't speak and I can't move and I fear that I might be paralyzed forever - trapped in the beauty of a moment. I know this might sound really far-fetched, but did you ever stare in wonderment at an amazing sunset? Just think of everything as an incomprehensibly amazing sunset. Have you ever looked into someone's eyes and seen them blink? - totally mesmerized by that blink. Have you ever looked into the fixed eyes of someone? - enthralled just by those eyes. Have you ever looked into someone's heart? Understanding that you don't know a damn thing about it, but it's there, amazing to infinity and beautiful beyond that.